He came up behind her and put his hands on her shoulders. As soon as he touched her, her body began to convulse in silent sobs.
“Just go!” she said in a choked whisper. She could not bear to have him see her like this, weak and sniveling.
“I am not betrothed,” he said, his breath against her hair. “I would have told you.”
“Edmund says it is all arranged.”
“It is true that the bishop and Bedford suggested the connection,” he said. “But that is all.”
She wiped her nose on her sleeve, even though it was very bad for the velvet.
“What will you do?” she asked, managing to keep her voice steady this time.
“I am the sort of man who needs a home, a family. A wife.”
It shouldn’t hurt this much to hear him say it. But in her heart, she knew this was true about him. She had known it since the day he left her in Paris. Tears were flowing so hard now that she did not bother swiping at them with her sleeve.
“I want more than a lover,” he said. “I want a woman who will make a life with me and be the mother of my children.”
He was leaving her.
She had to hold her breath to keep from breaking into loud sobs like a five–year-old. Misery twisted at her gut; at the same time, she felt faint and nauseous.
“I love you, Linnet, but ’tis all or nothing with me,” he said. “You will make your pledge to me, or I will find another.”
Jamie loved her.
As she turned to face him, his arms came around her. She rested her head against his chest. It had been such a long, long time since he had told her he loved her.
“Don’t leave me,” she whispered. “Don’t ever leave me.”
“There are promises I need from you,” he said.
“Just don’t go,” she said, closing her eyes and holding him tighter. “Don’t leave me again.”
She did not care what promises she had to make. All she wanted was to be here in his arms.
“I must have your word—”
“We can speak of this later, can we not?” She dropped her hands to his buttocks. “I missed you something fierce.”
His stern expression softened. “You did?”
“Every moment,” she said, her voice growing husky. He pulled her closer and brushed his cheek against hers. Against her ear, he said, “I missed you, too.”
She leaned back so he would see the desire in her eyes when she told him what she wanted from him. “I want you to tell me you love me again, when you are inside me.”
Her words had precisely the effect she hoped.
Jamie crushed her against him and kissed her with a fierceness that set fire prickling beneath her skin. Without lifting his mouth from hers, he backed her up until she leaned against the bed. He cradled her head in his hands, his fingers splayed in her hair, and gave her an openmouthed kiss of such hunger she wasn’t sure there would be anything left of her—and she didn’t care.
When he finally lifted his mouth from hers she gasped for breath—and sucked it in again when he cupped her breasts. His groan of need echoed her own as he buried his face in her neck. She gripped his hair in her hands as he pressed hot wet kisses down her throat.
He spun her around and began unfastening her gown. As his fingers worked the buttons, his ragged breath was in her ear and his shaft hard against her buttocks. Then his mouth was on her bare shoulder. Gentler now, he eased her gown and chemise down together, kissing her bare skin in its wake. She swallowed against the surge of desire when he gripped her hips and nipped her bottom.
A shiver of pleasure shot through her limbs as he ran his tongue up her back. When she turned in his arms, Jamie enfolded her in an embrace that warmed and comforted her, even while it made her heart pound with anticipation. He lifted her onto the bed and then broke away just long enough to strip off his clothes.
She opened her arms to him as he joined her on the bed. When his mouth found hers this time, it was a slow, lingering, openmouthed kiss. They melded into each other, tongues moving in a sensuous rhythm that was a prelude of what was to come.