“See? You’re doing great. Let’s switch to the orange now, so we can blend the area.”
Henley reached out to cup my cheek as Has-Been took over to change the colours for me.
“I’m so proud of you, sweetheart. You’re doing a beautiful job.”
“It’s just a bit of colouring in,” I whispered, feeling embarrassed at receiving some kind of accolade for something a child could do.
“On skin. Permanently on skin,” he pointed out, “my skin. Mine forever.”
“Okay, calm down, big fella. You get a boner while she’s working, and I’m out.”
I tuned out their banter again as I returned to the task at hand, filling the colour, blending the tones, and bringing the Phoenix to life on his chest.
When I’d finished, I handed the kit back to Has-Been, my face aching from smiling as I worked, because this was what I’d been missing. Sure, I was only touching up the colour within an image already drawn for me, but that part was irrelevant. I was doing what I’d worked so hard to learn and perfect. Something I now realised I was still capable of, something I’d doubted for so long, but no longer wanted to do without.
“Can I carry on now?” Rocket asked as he sat back down beside my chair, pulling fresh gloves on.
I leaned over to kiss Henley, sighing into it as he slid his fingers into my hair and deepened the kiss, both of us ignoring grumbles and banter around us. This moment was bigger than they probably realised, because it wasn’t just about us becoming us. It was about me becoming me again too. Henley seemed to understand that. He seemed to realise I needed to be pushed over that ledge, to be put into that situation so that I’d give it a go, and even though I knew he’d never have kept pushing if I’d been seriously saying no to it, I knew now that I’d been protesting so weakly that he knew he could keep urging me.
“Thank you,” I said to him, pulling back to smile at Has-Been next, “and thank you.”
He shrugged, feigning indifference, although I knew he too saw the significance of the moment.
“My hand needed a rest. You did me a favour.”
He winked as I rolled my eyes at him, because we both knew it was about so much more than that. I sat back down, and Rocket smoothed his hand over the skin he was tattooing on my side, lowering his voice just for me.
“You did good. It’s hard to get back to the things you thought you’d lost, but you did us all proud there.”
Chapter Thirty-Six
Things were resolved, weren’tthey? I thought they were, but when Glory woke me screaming for the third night in a row, even though we were sleeping down in the man cave still, I was starting to lose my confidence in anything being resolved for her. She was still being tormented by that fucker, and I hated it. I wanted to be able to do something, but what the fuck could I do?
“Glory, sweetheart, this is… this is killing you.”
“I’m not doing it on purpose,” she protested, tears glittering in the corners of her eyes as I pulled her into my arms.
“I know. I didn’t mean that, but I don’t know how to help you.”
“Maybe nobody can,” she sobbed, burying her face in my neck as she cried. It was killing me, just as much, just to see her being tormented like this. Just to see him not leaving her the fuck alone, when she deserved to be able to move on.
“You know he’s gone,” I said softly, reinforcing the point that her subconscious wasn’t grasping, and she nodded, huffing with frustration.
“I know.”
“And you know you’re safe with me, with the club. Nobody will ever hurt you again.”
“I know,” she gritted out, lifting her head to glare at me. There’s the fire that tells me she’s still fighting in there.
“Good. So what’s left to confirm for you? He’s gone, you’re safe, you’re moving on… you feel safe in this house, right?”
She nodded, but her eyes were still sharp, even despite the sparkle of tears.
“You’re getting your life back, you’re finding your love of art again, you’re learning to tattoo again.”
“Make your point, dammit!” She snapped at me this time, and there’s my girl. There’s my sweet, strong, sassy girl.
“You wanted to learn to defend yourself before. Do you think that might help? Learning to fight or at least learning how to block an attack?”