I finish my sip of coffee. “No. That isn’t unusual, though.He hasn’t had Lola spend the night yet, and he gets daycare updates. He normally tries to see her during a break or lunch, just not too often so he doesn’t disrupt the routine. But he also has many morning and lunchtime meetings. I’m not sure his fridge at home even has anything other than yogurt cups with animals printed on them and a few protein shakes.”
“You do have a glow. Good for you. You satisfied your curiosity, too. Right?”She wants to beam a smile but is keeping it in check so it doesn't come off as teasing me. I think she might have been shipping Hayes and me since she put two and two together about Lola.
I tilt my head to the side, trying to hide a blushing smile. It comes far too naturally. “The attraction is still there, that’s clear. He seems to be on a path of pursuit, too. He’s great with Lola.” I list everything, and it's all positive.
Savannah takes another drink and asks, “What’s the problem then?”
Pressing my lips together, I stare at my best friend before admitting a simple fact. “It’s not him. It’s me.”
Savannah nearly sputters her coffee as she breaks out in laughter. “Really? That’s the explanation you are going to use?That cliché? In your case, it’s also a lie.”
“Not exactly,” I sigh. “I just choose not to articulate the reasons why it’s me. Which is that it feels like it could all be too good to be true. I also haven’t dated in, like, years. I keep reminding myself to be cautious. I’m not 100% sure who is driving this ship, you know? One second, I think he’s letting me go at my own pace. Other times, he is frustratingly on a chase with his rules and actions, and if it wasn’t for my head spinning, then it is hot as hell, to be honest.”
“Listen, I don’t know him so well. Julian does. From what I’ve heard, Hayes is a good guy.”
“Yeah, I keep hearing that…” I reflect and glance into the new swarm of people arriving through the revolving doors. “Now I have the issue of what the hell to say or do now that we were intimate. Do I pretend nothing happened? Do I address it and set new boundaries? Or just say fuck it. Either of those options involves a bucket of nerves.”
“Hmm,” she ponders.
Both of our eyes drift to the side as Hayes approaches us. Cologne strong, charcoal suit finely pressed, his eyes landing right on me. My heart quickens because he’s near, and flashbacks of last night hit me. A question of the future, him, it all morphs together in a single second.
“Morning, ladies.” His grin is a crime.
“Hey there,” Savannah greets him, the best actress in the world, showing no signs that she is privy to the last 24 hours of my life.
“Morning,” I say and avert his gaze.
“My afternoon has been reshuffled. I would like to pick up Lola early, and I’ll bring her back before her bedtime.” I’m still not used to puzzling schedules, and it must read on my face. “Concessions. Co-parenting,” he reminds me.
I put all events between us aside, because this is about Lola. That’s maybe a good sign that I can compartmentalize.“Sure. She’ll like that.”I make the mistake of slipping my gaze back to him, where his eyes with a glint arrow straight into me. The flicker inside me doesn’t dampen, it’s even almost as exhilarating as last night.
In my peripheral view, I notice Savannah looking between us, a sly smile curving on her mouth.
“Well, I’ll leave you both. I have places to be, and I’m sure you two have a lot to talk about.” His face remains neutral, but the subtle tick of his cheek is there. “Have a good morning, ladies.” He turns and struts away with such confidence that the crowd parts.
The feeling of a hand on my arm brings my attention back to Savannah, who is grinning.
“Ooh, this is fun. Let me think… You two probably need an icebreaker to get you both over the hurdle of morning-after conversations. Might need to be an external force.”
“That would be a miracle,” I deadpan. I’m good with confrontation. I’ve done it many times since Hayes entered the picture. But when it comes to him and me on a romantic level, my talent goes out the door.
“Like, other than the leadership team,nobodyat the office realizes you two are together… I mean, that he’s Lola’s father?”
“Well, daycare and HR know. But they can’t say anything. The company is strict about NDAs and privacy, especially when it comes to kids. We mostly avoid each other. Or at least, I asked for that boundary. I don’t think anyone notices.”
She continues to think. Sometimes, when your best friend knows your thoughts and fears inside out and they appear to be conspiring, you should be worried.
But I have bigger fish to fry right now.
Blair continuesto inspect me even as I just closed my tablet after our one-on-one meeting that has now wrapped up. Throughout the whole meeting, she seemed to lose focus on our discussion. She has talent and is a team player but needs a bit more attention to detail. I always give compliments, then suggestions, then more compliments. The perfect sandwich method.
But right now? The roles seemed reversed.
“Elodie, can I be honest? Off the record?”
These meetings are for open conversation. I’m her superior who wants to listen, and compared to others, I feel I’m more approachable and easy to talk to.“Absolutely.” I smile.
Blair hesitates. “How do I say this?” She seems to be struggling.