CHAPTER 33
CALIGULA
I’ve been thinkingabout Tiberius most of the evening. Whether he was telling the truth, whether I believe him, whether it really matters. But at last, I hear footsteps in the hallway outside, and I take a seat on the bed.
It’s time for Damiano Orsini to make someone happy instead of miserable for a change.
The door opens, and he waits in the doorway, too still, too quiet. I can’t get a read on his mood. I haven’t seen him like this before. There’s anger there, I think, but it’s buried beneath weariness.
“Hi,” I say cautiously.
He takes a step into the room, shuts the door behind him, and locks it.
“Did you know it’s Sammy’s birthday tomorrow?” I ask him.
“What?”
“It’s Sammy’s birthday tomorrow,” I repeat. “Have you bought him something? Rosa is making him a cake, and I know Sammy would appreciate it if you had a gift to give him as well.”
But Dami barely registers what I’ve said. He goes into his walk-in closet and comes back out stripped to the skin, except for his underwear.
“What’s going on?” I ask.
“Nothing,” he says. And if I didn’t know Damiano Orsini was a liar before, I sure do now.
“Okay,” I say slowly. “So, what have you got Sammy for his birthday?”
“Nothing,” he says again, but this time there’s more puzzlement to the response. “I never get him anything. And it doesn’t matter to you anyway.”
“It does matter to me, actually,” I counter. “Sammy hates me, but he loves you, and if you could give him something special, it would show him that he’s still part of this household. Still important to you.”
Damiano just stares at me. I feel a rising sense of frustration at this man who seems so determined to show zero emotional intelligence, despite the fact that he cares so much for everyone under his roof.
“Look,” I try again, “he’shurting. My being here…it’s hurt him. I bet he had more of your attention before I got here. Right?”
Still nothing. Just that stare, dark and bottomless.
“And…whatever happens between us,” I go on carefully, “he’ll be here after I’m gone.”
“After you’re gone,” he repeats. “Yes.”
“So don’t drop the ball on him while I’m here. Don’t make him feel like he’s second-best. If you give him something—even something small—it’ll show him you still care about him.”
I still can’t read his face. “You feeling guilty, Clemenza?” he asks at last. “You want to undo what your Family did?”
“I can’t,” I say bluntly. “My God, I wish I could, Dami. I really fucking do. And yes, since you ask, Idofeel guilty about it, but it doesn’t change the fact that tomorrow is his birthday, and if you were slightly less of an asshole, you’d know that yourself.”
“What am I supposed to get him?” he snaps.
I smile. This idea has been marinating in my head all day in the background, behind the shadow of Tiberius. “A Lorenzo Benedetti suit.”
Damiano just blinks slowly at me.
“Sammy loves fashion,” I argue as though he’s disagreed. “He dresses in knock-off designer stuff, but I bet he’d love a Benedetti creation. And he deserves the same quality and care as…” I trail off.
Damiano stays silent.
Maybe he’s right. Maybe I do just feel shitty and guilty, and I think making Dami buy Sammy an expensive suit will somehow make up for what my people did.