Shocked, Nicola looked at Janet, who was very close to boxing her sister’s silly ears. “It was foolish talk, my lady,” Janet explained, trying to downplay the importance of such gossip. “Raven and Liesl overheard the knights speaking of you. It was simply gossip.”
“It wasnotsimply gossip!” Raven insisted. “They were speaking of Lady Thorne and Kenton le Bec, and they were concerned that le Bec was paying too much attention to Lady Thorne, so much so that they were fearful that Warwick would discover his interest in Lady Thorne and send her away!”
Nicola’s mouth popped open in surprise as Liesl, behind her, spoke up. “It is true, my lady,” she said. “We heard them say that Sir Kenton had orders from Warwick that he was not fulfilling because he was smitten by you. They said that they were going to speak to Kenton about you but I do not know if they did.”
Nicola stared at Liesl in horror, digesting what she’d been told. “How would you know such a thing?” she asked, her voice oddly hollow. “How in the world would you hear these men speak of me?”
Raven lost some of her indignant stance. “We… we were near Matthew’s chamber and heard them speaking,” she said, refusing to admit that they had deliberately been listening in. “Both Matthew and Gaston speak rather loudly and we couldn’t help but hear them. It seemed to me that they were going to tell Sir Kenton that he must follow Warwick’s orders or he would be in trouble.”
Nicola blinked, somewhat stumped by the information. “In trouble with Warwick?”
Raven nodded. “Because of you.”
“How long ago did you hear this?”
“Just over a week ago, my lady. Not very long at all.”
Just over a week ago.The words, all of them, were tumbling around in Nicola’s head and she labored to make sense of everything, like pieces to a puzzle that did not yet fit together but somehow, someway, she began to suspect that all of it had something to do with that terrible day when she heard Kenton dismiss her as something to be used. The timeline seemed close enough;just over a week ago. Weren’t Wellesbourne and de Russe in the solar with Kenton when she heard the man speak those terrible words? She thought she may have heard their voices and she knew that Kenton was speaking to his knights, but she hadn’t known who, exactly, he had been speaking with.
What if it had, indeed, been Wellesbourne and de Russe confronting him about spending an abundance of attention on Lady Thorne and threatening to go to Warwick with the information?What if…what if Kenton had merely told them he was using her so they would not tell Warwick of his behavior? What if Kenton had lied about his true intentions towards her, lying to his knights so they would not betray him or his feelings to their liege?
What if he was simply defending his true intentions towards her to throw them off the scent?
Oh, God….
Heavily, Nicola sat on the bed behind her. The truth was that her knees gave out and she simply plopped down onto it. There had been no conscious choice to sit. Her knees would no longer hold her. She sat there a moment, gripping the edge of the bed, wondering if her act of betrayal had been based on Kenton trying to keep the two of them together.Warwick would send you away.Kenton didn’t want her to be sent away.
He was trying to keep them together.
I love you….
Nicola could hardly breathe through the horror she was feeling. Dear God, was it possible? Had he truly only been trying to throw Wellesbourne and de Russe off his trail? Why, oh why, hadn’t she confronted him about his words? Why hadn’t she asked him to explain himself? Instead, she had believed the worst and her feelings of pain and betrayal had taken over her common sense. She had betrayed the man who loved her.
Whomsheloved.
Aye, she loved him. She couldn’t remember when she hadn’t. Now, her treachery had cost her everything, including the man she loved.
Dear God… what have I done?
Forcing herself to breathe, to think, Nicola stood up from the bed unsteadily. She had to go downstairs, to see to the status of Babylon and to see what her act of betrayal had done to Kenton’s men. She suddenly felt quite protective of them, as misplaced and late as those feelings were. Smoothing at her hair, her mind wandering to thoughts of Kenton and the degree of damage she had done to him, she moved for the chamber door.
“Thank you for telling me what Wellesbourne and de Russe had said about me,” she said, her voice trembling with emotion. “But it truly doesn’t matter what they think now, does it? Babylon is back in the hands of Edward, where it belongs, and it is time for me to assess the situation. I will also procure some food for the boys while I am gone, but you will remain here and bolt the door. Do not open it for anyone but me. Is that clear?”
Janet, Raven, and Liesl nodded fearfully but Tab came up next to his mother and clutched her hand.
“I will go with you,” he said.
Nicola was momentarily forced away from her tumultuous thoughts, gazing down at her son and thinking his offer sounded very grown-up. “There is no need,” she said. “I will return as soon as I can.”
Tab was serious. “But you may need protection,” he said. “I will protect you.”
It was a sweet thing to say and Nicola couldn’t help but smile at her brave boy. “Protection from what?” she asked. “These men are loyal to Edward. They will not harm me.”
Tab remained quite serious. He went to the door and opened it for his mother. “Come along,” he said. “I will escort you. We do not know these men and they could be cruel.”
“If they are cruel, then I do not want you where they are. I want you here, safe.”
“If they are cruel, then I will defend you.”