We've got three more years to wait before our future starts.
"This is really your church, huh?" he asks.
"It really is—has been my whole life."
"Does your family still go here?"
"Most of them," I say, handing over two trays of tacos. "We could run into someone today."
His head whips toward me at that. "Your family? Here? Why didn't you say something?"
"Believe it or not, I wasn't that eager to see that look of terror on your face."
A group of five or six kids runs up to us then, food tickets in their hands, and we swap them for nachos they’re likely to drop.
"Are you—I mean, does everyone here know you're—" Jamie stops and looks around until well-practiced composure replaces fear. He could come back with sarcasm and a smile, but I think he always saved his most caustic responses for the press. “Wow. Even at church.”
"Even at church, yes," I say. "There were only so many times I could turn down dates with their beautiful, single daughters before they became concerned enough to push for more information."
"And they're fine with it?"
"What did you say earlier? 'Teacher, coach, and saintlike volunteer,' right?" I smile. "But no, I'd say there's been a range of acceptance. The people you met today are on the good end of it. And if Crissy and Isa are around—”
“Crissy and Isa?”
“Cristina and Isabella. My sisters. They said they might be here with their kids, but I haven’t heard from them today, so who knows.”
“Okay,” Jamie says.
His tone makes me wonder whether it is, but I let it go. “What about your family—your parents? Have they ever suspected that you like men? I know there was a rumor a long time ago, but it was buried beneath stories of many beautiful women and no small amount oflate-night trouble. What would they say if they knew about me?”
He goes back to his tower of chili cheese nachos for several seconds, then wipes his mouth and sighs from beneath his baseball cap before he answers. "My parents blasted all rumors, no matter what they were. It was easier for them to dismiss everything off the ice as nonsense—orgies, arrests, cocaine, brawls, men—even if it might be true. 'You need tofocus, Jameson. Make them talk about what you doonthe ice.'" He sighs again. "You? I don't know what they'd say. I really don't. I let them down when I broke my leg, so maybe I don't have much further to fall."
I'm close to pointing out that a freak accident and a shattered leg shouldn't be causes for parental disappointment, but I've seen worse as a teacher, and Jamie doesn't need a lecture today. I don't know what hedoesneed once he's done licking salt from his fingers, and I've tried to push most of what I want aside while I study the sad blue eyes I see in my sleep.
“How much does Kai know?”
“Enough to understand why I’m at the bar alone these days.”
I raise an eyebrow. “You were alone the night we met.”
“But I hadn’t been there in months,” he says. “And I wasn’t supposed to be alone after.”
He isn’t alone today. He's here with me, and now I need to figure out what comes next. Then Eileen returns with her husband in tow, and I don't have to ask why before she answers on her own.
"Our grandkids want to stick around for a while, and this guy was pouring our life savings into infinite attempts to land a metal ring around the neck of a bottle," she explains. "Thought I'd drag him back here to keep him out of trouble and give you boys the rest of your shift off."
I glance at Jamie because I'm not sure whether his plans include more time in a place he hadn't meant to be for longer than a minuteor two. He glances at me because I'm supposed to speak on our behalf either way.
My response isn't much more than a flustered thanks as we switch places, followed by the press of my fingers against the small of Jamie's back. It means I'm guiding him away from something uncomplicated the same way I'd brought him toward it a few hours ago, and when we find some room to stop, I step away and let my hand fall to my side.
"So," he says.
"So."
Jamie ducks his head for a second or two, then his attention is on me again. "You want to do the rides and games and shit."
"If I have a friend to do them with, yeah," I shrug.