When I stay silent, he sighs. “Drake, my precious boy. It’s never going to have a happy ending with him; you know that, right?”
“It’s not like that, and I owe him. He dropped everything to help me after Warrior. I can’t turn away from him; he needs me here.”
“I wondered who it was, and it is great he helped. But have you considered that was his way of paying you back? That you were even.”
No, I’ve never thought that. Why does my Pops always get everything so right? My point of view was it was always Grant who did the worst thing. That we were both victims of his hatred for gays. He wanted to split us up and did it in such a hateful way, and we both suffered.
“It doesn’t matter anymore. I’m done keeping score. I’m in New York now and will be over here until his tour finishes.” I feel guilty enough for deserting Finn without Pops adding to my guilt. “Please don’t say anything about who I’m with. But if you can get Finn’s phone number for me, without making too much of a fuss, I’d be grateful.” Nothing’s set in stone with him and me; if he’s still interested when I get back, then we can see what happens.
I want things with him, and being here isn’t going to change that. Both Rafe and I know that there’s nothing between us anymore. Our friendship has evolved over the years since we were together; we know there’s nothing but love and respect for each other. I can easily call him my best friend; I’m not sure other people around me can believe or understand this.
Rafe’s bedroom door opens. He’s in his one-hundred-percent superstar mode, and he looks stunning. I get back to my call. “I’ve got to go. Can you get Finn’s number; I’ll call him to explain. I’ll call again when I can. Love you.”
Rafe wraps a studded leather cuff around his wrist, fastening it quickly, then looks at me. “I’m ready.” Rafe calls Martin, who agrees to meet us at the lift. “The car will be waiting for us.”
Martin and I stand in the dark behind all the cameras and crew filming the evening chat show. The audience laugh and clap at the right time, and Rafe glows in the lights. It’s going well. He’s a true star; everyone loves him.
I watch as Rafe looks through the crowd of crew members, searching for something or someone, because whenhis eyes fall on me, he smiles. Of course, that’s noticed, and the host swivels her head to look. Her eyes widen when she sees me, then, turning back to Rafe, her next question is obvious.
“So, tell me Rafe, who’s the cutie that’s worth that million-dollar smile?”
A pale pink blush creeps over his cheeks. I’m eager to hear what says. “That’s my best friend, and he’s here to hang out for a while.”
I smile at him, glad he hasn’t put a job title on me.
I press the button for Drake’s apartment. There’s nothing. I’m not expecting to have the conversation about being let in like I was the other week. There’s no buzz or click for the main door to be opened. I press again and muse ruefully for not exchanging phone numbers. Why didn’t we do that? There’s still no answer, but then the door opens, and a guy about my age comes out, holding the door open for me to enter.
“Thanks, bud,” I say with a cheerful smile. The lift is again on the ground floor, so after entering, I press for the eighth floor. It’s a quick ascent with no stops on the way. I knock on his door. “Hey, Drake, it’s me. Don’t worry about being decent.” I chuckle. There’s no answer; I can’t even hear footsteps approaching the door. Disappointed, I trudge back to the lift. He could be at the gym; it’s not like we said a specific time. I get back in my car, and it’s only then that I notice that Drake’s car is missing.
I make a detour home to grab some clean gym gear, then drive the twenty minutes it takes to get to the gym. This time, I scan the car park for his car, but it’s absent. No sign of him here either. Oh well, I’m here now, I may as well work out. It’s busy, which I guess is to be expected on the weekend. I swipe my card to get through the turnstile and walk along the outside of the main gym. Knox’s door is open, but when I look in, it’s empty. The locker room is busy too. I see Memphis and head to him. “Hey, are you coming or going?”
“Just got here. Robin wanted to talk to the boys, so I came here. He looked all stressed out. Something to do with Drake.” He shrugs his shoulder, then a smile lifts one corner of his mouth. “And talking about Drake, what did the two of you have to discuss that had you shooting out of your seat to catch him? Are you two gonna hook up? I mean as a Dom and sub, or do you want to try more than a scene? I don’t know him as well; I told you he was already in the army when I lived there. He was in some intelligence or something regiment. I think that’s where all the spy jokes come from.”
I remember Drake saying if he told me he’d have to kill me. I smile at his fake serious expression.
“So?” Memphis asks. I’m not sure what he’s asking about; he went off topic talking about Drake being a spy. “Are you interested in him? You know he had a bad experience a couple of months ago. I’m not quite sure what happened; I’d only just got with Royal. But Saint says it was really bad. And coming from him that’s not good. I’ve seen the marks on Noah after a night at the club, but that’s never in anger. Saint knows and understands Noah’s limits.”
“Nothing happened. He took me to collect my car. That’s all,” I lie, and Memphis’ face falls.
“That’s not interesting,” he huffs. “Get changed, and we can work out together.”
After ninety minutes, I’m done in. I’ve gone through all my reps and run a few miles on the treadmill. Memphis has had enough as well. “Are you coming to the house? Pops is doing a lasagne; it’s fantastic. Loads of garlic bread and salad too. You’ll be welcome.”
Do I want to go? I could find out what’s happened to Drake or not. It could be a private matter, which is why Robin wanted to speak privately. “Is Drake ill? Has something happened to him?”
“Um, random.” He laughs. “Sorry, you’re serious. No, it didn’t sound like it was an emergency. You can ask if you come.”
I’m shaking my head. “No, it’s okay. I’ve got things to do; I need to go back and get more clothes and some other things. I didn’t plan to stay for good, after only one visit. I’ll go back home. I need to get it ready to sell. So, I’ll probably stay a couple of days.”
He gives me a weird look. Like he doesn’t understand why I would be doing that. “Really? You’re turning the best lasagne in the world down to drive to Lincoln at”—he looks at the time on his phone—“Three o’clock in the afternoon?”
“Yeah.” It does sound stupid when he says it. I’ll be going back to an empty house and a lonely night by myself. But I don’t want to hear why Drake rushed away, if his family even knows. “I’ll call you when I know when I’m coming back.”
I keep myself busy at home by making the office rooms more domestic and giving the place a thorough clean. Some of the rooms need a fresh coat of paint, and I replace the carpet in the living room. I don’t know if it’s wasted money if I’m selling it, but it should be more saleable. Something that the estate agent agrees with, and with a price agreed on, the house is up for sale. Admittedly, it’s not a brilliant time, but with a realistic price, it just might catch the eye of the perfect buyer.
After ten days away, I’m ready to get back to my new hometown. I may not be the one for Drake, but he’s not the only man in the world that will suit me. I’m sure a night at Bound, the club where all the Foster brothers are members, will do me a lot of good. It’s time I got past the horrors of what Matt and Mansbridge did to me. Memphis has moved on; I can too.
My car is laden down with everything I need for now. The rest is in one of the self-storage places, and I can get it moved when I find the right place to live. I can get a mortgage on my salary and use my savings as a deposit, so I don’t need thehouse sold before I buy another. The sale will then pay off the mortgage. If it goes as simply as that.