“Well, I can tell you what LAX islike.”
“You haven’t left the airport?” she asked. The light turned green, and with a flutter of nerves, Rainey pressed the gas and followed the car in front of her. It was, admittedly, veryeasy.
“We’re walking to baggage claim,” he said. “But for an airport, there’s lots of natural light, it’s very crowded, and rathermodern.”
“Somehow, that doesn’t surprise me,” shemuttered.
“Are you still waiting for the light to change?” heasked.
Rainey found herself smiling. “No, I turned. I’m onJohnston.”
“Alright!” he cheered. “Just keep going. You’re doinggreat.”
She couldn’t help her blush. “Do you have any idea how weird and embarrassing it is to have your boyfriend cheer for you for driving down theroad?”
Jacques’s response was as dry as paper. “Nope. I’ve never had aboyfriend.”
To her horror, Rainey snorted a laugh, and this made Jacques laugh inreturn.
“Seriously, babe, don’t be embarrassed. This ishuge.” His voice softened again. “I’m so proud ofyou.”
Rainey braked at the intersection of Johnston and South College. Just one more block and a left turn, and she’d be at the jewelry store. The excitement of the prospect and the feeling behind Jacques’s words set her heart beating a littlefaster.
She inhaled deeply and let out her breath. “Thankyou.”
The light turned green, and as though she’d driven every day for the last six years, Rainey hit thegas.
Could it really be that simple? Had it always been just thatsimple?
She crossed the intersection and immediately signaled to make a left. Waiting for a break in traffic should have been the scariest part. She couldn’t just rely on a traffic signal to tell her what to do. She’d have to use her own judgment and wait for a safe opportunity tocross.
But when the time came, a gap opened up so wide, she could have crawled across it with time to spare. Rainey turned and found a parking spot in front of thejeweler’s.
“I’m here,” she said, the truth of what she’d done settling over her. “I didit.”
“You did it,” Jacques echoed, pride stoking hisvoice.
Rainey laughed, her eyes tearing as she did. “I-it waseasy.”
Jacques laughed too. “You soundsurprised.”
“I am surprised… and maybe…” She struggled for words. “…maybe a little mad at myself. I mean, would it have been this easy six yearsago?”
Jacques’s tone changed completely. He almost scolded. “Clearly not. It was easy because you were ready.” Then his voice gentled. “You weren’t ready six yearsago.”
She could accept that, but surely she’d lost time. Wasted years stuck in this one circumstance of herlife.
“But what about two years ago or last year?” she asked, desperate to find theanswer.
Jacques cleared his throat. “Well, I don’t know. Are you the same person today as you were a yearago?”
Rainey spluttered a laugh, the truth hitting her like a 2 X 4. “No. No, I’mnot.”
Indeed, she wasn’t the same person she’d been six months ago. Looking back now, she saw a series of circumstances that had forced her to outgrow the fear that had ruled her life. Her mother and Kendall had moved to Galveston at the end of November, taking with them half of Rainey’s social circle and the better part of her safetynet.
And then Holi had fallen ill just weeks later. They hadn’t known her diagnosis then, of course, but even little things in the household had to change, though neither sister really noticed at the time. Rainey had to go to the store more — on foot or on bicycle — for things like ibuprofen, the ingredients for chicken soup, prescriptionantibiotics.
Of course, learning Holi’s diagnosis and meeting Jacques, which had happened almost simultaneously, were the two greatest agents of change in Rainey’s life. For the first time in six years, she wanted. She wanted to help her sister, and she wantedJacques.