“That’s it. Just like that.”
“Nnh.” I groan as the stretch grows painful.
He kisses my temple. “Almost there.”
I give another push, and finally, the plug pops free.
Ian sets it aside and repositions me to hold me close. I slump against him, overcome by the strain of it all. But also strangely calm. I draw a deep breath that brings me the faint notes of cedar and cardamom. His scent. It’s safe. Somehow, despite everything he’s done,he’ssafe.
“Thank you,” I whisper.
“For taking out the plug?”
I shake my head. “That too, but…”
He leans back to watch me. “What then?”
“I don’t know.”
He grabs my jaw and levels me with an earnest expression. “You’re much more submissive than I could have ever imagined, Jenna. So much more.”
Part of me wants to balk at his assessment. Being a pleaser has never been a good thing—not in the eyes of anyone. But I find no trace of mockery or condescension in Ian’s expression.
It’s a compliment. Maybe even a huge one.
20
The Compromise
Ian
I shouldn’t have delivered that punishment. I shouldn’t have even checked the piano bench. Jenna had already had more than enough for one day, and I knew pushing her would be risky even before I entered the room. But seeing sweet, innocent Jenna sitting there, looking all nervous, I couldn’t hold back. She begged to be ravished, spanked, and humiliated, just by being herself. I knew I’d find an excuse to do just that underneath the hem of the T-shirt. The shy girl likes having her ass stuffed. So I lost control and pushed her more than I should have. I knew I was going too far the moment she leaned against the piano, her legs quivering with the sheer effort of remaining upright.
But as I carry Jenna to the living room and she clings to me like I’m the safest place in the world, I don’t regret it one bit. Because as much as sex and deep talks bring closeness, there’s nothing to forge intimacy like pushing a submissive to the edge—or just beyond it—and then comforting her as she cries herself out.
Jenna didn’t just need the cry. She needed something stronger. So I told her to scream. And when she did, it was themost intimate moment of my life. It was like she bared her soul to me in that very moment, and I know this won’t be the last time I push her so far. Because I wantmore. I want to bare her completely. Strip away her defenses until she’s naked, inside-out, so I can uncover all that anger and hurt that seems to be tucked away deep inside her.
In the living room, I sink onto the couch with her in my arms. She’s about to crawl off me when I reach for a blanket.
“Uh-uh.” Wrapping an arm around her waist, I prevent further retreat. “You’re not going anywhere, my sweet little sub.”
She seems surprised when I pull her back into my lap.
“You’re not used to getting comfort for free, are you?”
She doesn’t answer, and I don’t press. Verbal, sexual, and emotional intimacy are three very different things, and just because I’ve plunged her headfirst into the latter two doesn’t mean she’s ready for more. If anything, it means that she’s had more than enough, considering the short time we’ve known each other.
Furthermore, pushing would very likely bring her into a dilemma that might cause her to forget my most important rule. Exemptions are not an option this early in the new dynamic. I would have to come up with a milder punishment, like making her eat a spoonful of sharp mustard, and I fear even that might break her.
I wrap the blanket around her and hold her tight, and she openly leans into me. It doesn’t take long before she drifts off, maybe even falls asleep.
It’s been half an hour of quiet silence and just holding her when footsteps sound on the stairs.
“Out,” I say when Killian appears at the door.
He points toward the kitchen. “Relax, I was just grabbing a bite to eat.”
I cover Jenna’s ear to cushion the sound as I harden my voice. “Get out.”