“Uh, no. I’m sure the questions I have, you won’t give me the answers to anyway. I just pray that never happens again when I’m around you.”
“Try me.”
“Huh?”
“Try me. You said I wouldn’t answer your questions, but who knows, I might be in the mood to talk today. So, ask away.”
Shaking my head, I replied, “Nope, you know what? I don’t want to ask any questions because I’m afraid of the answers that you might give me.”
“That’s fair. Since you don’t want to talk about that, what would you like to talk about?”
“Uh, nothing much. I think we’re all caught up on everything.”
“And what about last night?” He asked, raising his eyebrow.
I wasn’t sure if he could see the sweat that had instantly began to form on my body or not, but that was a topic that I’d much rather forget. I had been praying all morning that we didn’t have to have this talk, and that I could just continue pretending as though I didn’t kiss my boss when I was way too drunk to drive myself home from a bar where I’d just gotteninto an altercation with my cheating ex-boyfriend. I knew he had already judged me for that, and I didn’t need to add insult to injury.
“Uh, what about it? I was so out of it, and I don’t remember much. I’m sorry you had to see me like that, though. I normally don’t even drink, so I don’t know what I was thinking drinking that much on a work night.”
Laughing, he pulled me closer and connected his lips with mine. The way my pussy tingled from his touch set my entire body on fire. I couldn’t believe that we were doing this again. It was so wrong. He was my boss, Logan’s man or whatever the hell they considered him to be to her, and he was all wrong for me. He clearly had some shit going on that I wanted no parts of, but at the same time, I couldn’t break myself away from the kiss if I wanted to.
“Do you remember that part now?” He asked, pulling away while I was sure that I still had hearts in my eyes. I felt like one of those cartoon characters who had gotten knocked upside the head and had those little birds flying around them.
“Yes, I remember. I’m sorry that I kissed you.”
“Why are you sorry?”
“Because you’re my boss. And we should definitely not cross that line. I need this job, and I can’t let anything ruin that.”
“I hear you. Well, I guess we’re clear on that.” I wasn’t sure how to respond to him.Were we clear? Was that what I truly wanted?
The longer I sat there thinking about it, the more I realized that it was the way things needed to be. I was attracted to Sincere, but that was where we had to leave things. I couldn’t fall for him and end up ruining everything I was trying to rebuild for myself. I had already let Ray fuck up my career once, and I wasn’t going to give another man the chance to do that to me again.
The rest of our day went on just like the others. We went to meetings, ate lunch, worked until we couldn’t anymore, and went home. I was okay with where we left things. We’d shared two kisses and decided that it was best to keep things professional. Well, I guess I had decided that was the best thing to do. Sincere never really confirmed that he was in agreement with me, but I was going to consider his lack of response as implied consent.
The momentwe walked into the party, I knew that it was going to be a different vibe than what we were used to. Raelynn had received an invite from a guy she was seeing, and because she wasn’t sure whether she was feeling him, she asked Zaveah and me to tag along. I had no problem getting out of the house. My personal time these days was so limited, and any time that I got to hang out with my girls, I was going to take it.
And, if that wasn’t reason enough for me to want to get out of the house, Sincere was enough reason to. Ever since we shared that kiss, it had been hard as hell for me to stop thinking about him. I knew that we both agreed to act as though it never happened, but that was so much easier said than done, especially for me. Well, truthfully, I couldn’t pretend as though I knew what was going through his head. But at work, it seemed as though he’d gone right back to normal, so I was going to assume that he’d moved on and forgotten all about it.
When it came to me, on the other hand, it was all I thought about. At work, at home, and whenever I was doing something, that man plagued my mind, and I didn’t know what to do about it. I knew that there would never be anything between the two of us, but damn, I’d be lying if I said that I didn’t want there tobe. Under different circumstances, he would’ve been a man that I would’ve liked to explore something more with. But he was my boss, and some things were better left as fantasies rather than trying to act on them.
“Oh, look, Ken, isn’t that your boss over there?” Zaveah asked, bringing me back to reality.
Turning in the direction that she pointed in, I smiled. Sure enough, it was him. He was having a conversation with a group of men, and I wasn’t sure whether, from where he stood, he could see us, too. And that was perfectly fine with me. If I could, I was going to do my best to avoid him for the rest of the night. I didn’t want him to think that I was stalking him or something like that.
“Are you going to go over there and speak to the man?” Zaveah asked.
“Nope. This is not a work event. I’m sure that he doesn’t want to be bothered.”
“If you say so, scaredy-cat,” Zaveah said, laughing.
Instead of paying them any attention, I looked around until I figured out where the drinks were so that I could grab the one that I planned on drinking for the night. Ever since Sincere had to take me home from the bar, I had been limiting myself to one drink while I was out. And being that he was at the same party, I didn’t want a repeat of the previous night.
“Oh, there’s my friend, I’m going to go say hello,” Raelynn said at the same time that Zaveah dipped off to do whatever she did at these kinds of parties.
While I liked to think that both Raelynn and I were friendly and could engage with people because of our jobs, Zaveah was different. She had the kind of personality that just drew you in, and an energy you wanted to be part of. That was why she always found herself in the most bizarre situations. I prayed that one day she’d find a man who deserved that energy from her.
“Kenedi? Kenedi Mathis, is that you?” I heard someone say as I grabbed my lemon drop from the bartender.