“It is… yes, wonderful,” the Duke said.
He did not smile as Octavia was. He did not cry. And while he said that he was happy, there was something about the expression on his face that suggested otherwise.
No doubt he is just confused, as I am. This is a lot, but I know that when he has time to consider it, he will be as thrilled as I am.
Octavia was thrilled. She took in the scene before her. She smiled at her brother. She beamed for Lady Redgate. She let the tears flow down her cheeks because this might have just been the happiest day of her life.
For so many years now, Octavia had worried about her future, as well as her brother’s. Now, for the first time, she no longer had to worry. For all the hardships she had been through, all the struggles, those long nights and lonely days, she knew now that such things were of the past.
She and Henry were finally going to be given the life that they both deserved. That, she knew, was all that mattered. A happily ever after, as she had always dreamed.
Chapter Twenty-Six
It all happened so fast. One minute, Lady Redgate…no, Dorethea, she told me to call her that. How strange.One minute she was telling Octavia that she was her long-lost grandmother, and the next she was insisting that Octavia and Henry come and live with her at once.
Octavia, so swept up in the moment, so enamored with images of what her future might now hold, had agreed without pause. Why would she not? This was more than she could have ever dreamt, and it was her right.
It wasn’t until Dorethea left and Octavia was given time to reckon with the consequences of what had happened that she began to realize that things were nowhere near as simple as she wanted them to be. Then again, when were they ever?
Really, she could not stop thinking about the Duke.
It was as Henry raced around her bedroom, already speaking about their new life as if he had lived it every day since birth, that she sat silently on her bed and pictured the Duke’s face when he had learned who she was and what this meant for their future.
He told me he was happy for me, which I do believe. But one can be happy and disappointed at the same time.
“When are we leaving?” Henry asked as he jumped onto her bed. “We are going to live with Grandmother, yes?”
She laughed and pulled him into a hug. “Were you not today begging me to stay here?”
He grimaced and looked away as if embarrassed. “I… I do love it here, Octavia. But just because we live somewhere else does not mean we can’t come back.” He looked at her hopefully now. “Aaron and I can still play. Every day.”
“I am sure he will like that.”
“And you and His Grace will still be friends,” he pressed on her as if he needed her to confirm it. “Now that we are the same, it will be better. Won’t it be better?”
Oh, how she wanted to tell him that it would be. And how she wanted to believe it. On the surface, such wistful aspirations made perfect sense, and Octavia wanted to be able to say without thought that this revelation could only lead to greener pastures.
She had wondered for so long about herself and the Duke, knowing that nothing could come from their relationship because of their differences in birth. Now that this was not an issue…should this not be good news?
And yet, she could not stop thinking about how the Duke had reacted to the news. He had feigned happiness, but she had seen the sadness in his eyes. The sense that he was losing something… someone.
“It will be better,” she said, hugging her brother tight. “And we leave tomorrow, I think. Best to make a fresh start quickly.”
Octavia had to speak to the Duke. She had to hear him tell her that everything would be fine. This was not the end of them. This was not how their story concluded. Before she learned of who she was, Octavia had sensed their connection growing, just as she had felt what could only be described as passion and even love blooming between them.
She had to believe that this changed nothing.
So it was that when Henry was put to bed, Octavia made her way toward the Duke’s office. He had been locked away inside since Dorethea had left, claiming he needed to work, even if it felt more like he was hiding. He knew that Octavia would leave tomorrow, so he should have wanted to see her tonight… to spend as much time with her as he could.
She reached the closed office door. She hesitated, her heart racing, nerves spiking through her. It felt similar to when shehad first moved here, as if she was doing something wrong by seeking him out. As if he did not want to see her…
Do not be silly, Octavia. You are reading into this. This is a good thing. It must be!
With that in mind, she took a deep breath and knocked on the door.
There was no answer.
She knocked again, and once more, silence was what greeted her.