“He’s not mine.”
“So you’re not the fiancée in the arrangement?” Her question confirms that what those women said wasn’t malicious gossip; it was simply the truth.
“No,” I say slowly, loud enough for Rodrick to hear as he approaches. “And I haven’t had the pleasure of meeting the duke’s bride-to-be yet.”
The guilty-shocked look on his face tells me everything: yes, he will soon be committed to someone.
“It was lovely meeting you, Princess Jazmina. I hope to see you again.”
I could tell her it’s improbable, but realistically? It’s impossible. Whether I’m under supervision or not, I will never let Rodrick drag me back to Scotland just to watch him romance his bride.
“The pleasure was mine, Isla. And don’t forget what I told you about appearances. You’re beautiful.”
“Thank you, Jazmina. I wish you lived here.” She surprises me by kissing my cheek before walking away.
“Ready to go?” he asks softly, as if afraid I’ll break.
I encase myself in the icy shell I’ve used my whole life with my father’s other wives and my half-sisters.
“More than ready.”
Chapter 19
The drive back to Rodrick’s castle was filled with silence, even though I occasionally felt his eyes on me.
Not talking is unnatural to me—I’m always the one who starts a conversation—but in that situation I had nothing to say.
Too many emotions were tangled inside me, so instead of trying to understand them all, I pushed everything to the back of my mind and decided to forget that kiss ever happened.
When I told him I preferred returning to my apartment the next day instead of Monday, he didn’t argue, but he did make me promise I wouldn’t leave without at least one bodyguard once I was back in London.
Of course I agreed, because from now on, I’ll try to stay off his radar. The less we see each other, the better, and for that, I need to behave.
I keep telling myself his marriage has nothing to do with me. We are nothing to each other, and that kiss probably meant absolutely nothing to him.
The best thing I can do is forget it and live my life.
Still, the thought that keeps circling in my head is that Rodrick seems like the last man alive who’d marry for convenience.
He looks like someone who only does what he wants. A ruler of his own world. King of his territory.
Then I remember what that woman said about him needing to marry or risk losing his title.
I’m not naïve. I grew up knowing I wasn’t the owner of my destiny, that I had duties to my people. That’s the very reason I came to Europe before having to bind myself to a life that probably won’t be the one I dream of.
Even so, I can’t imagine Rodrick being with someone he feels nothing for. On the other hand, arranged beginnings can change over time. My own brother married Adeela because he had to, not because he loved her. But over the months, love grew and overpowered everything else.
It’s not unusual in our circles for people to marry out of duty instead of burning passion, though passion is exactly what I want for myself: a marriage born of love.
“You have no idea how happy I am to see you okay,” Josephine says before she even reaches my table.
We arranged to meet at a café near the university. I was only going to call, but she insisted she needed to see me in person to make sure I was really fine.
“I am, thank you. Rodrick told me what happened, but things are still fuzzy.”
“I don’t know if you want to hear what I found out, Jazmina.”
“Tell me.”