Unbidden, I hear his voice, clear as the day is bright.Be brave.
With him, I am. I’ve been changing. I know it. I’ve become more comfortable in my skin, more confident because he allows me space to grow.
Then what’s stopping me from doing that now?
I’ve been promising myself to move into the future as a stronger version of who I was. Maybe it’s time for me todosomething to show I’ve grown. I can’t simply keep wishing for change when I don’t take steps to make it happen.
I exit the café before I change my mind and walk around the block until I’m standing at the entrance of the cricket club. The vinyl logo of a bat and ball on the glass greets me and I can’t help but run my fingers along the edge of the design.
Like a puzzle piece notching into an empty slot, my heart locks in place. It’s been years since I last touched a cricket bat. The acheis so visceral, my vision blurs. But, instead of the fog of crushing bitterness, there is now the hope of something sweet. With new beliefs giving me wings, I enter the cleanly maintained building and approach the lady working the reception desk.
“Hello,” she greets me, her polite smile growing confused by my nervous appearance.
I square my shoulders, clasping both hands together to stop them from trembling. In the most professional voice I can muster, I say, “I’d like to speak with your program director, please.”
38
CALLUM
Me:
You up?
My Tots:
Yes. Are you ok? Tough loss.
Me:
I’d like a distraction…
My Tots:
How can I help?
Me:
I’m waiting in your parking lot
My Tots:
You’re what?!
Me:
Ten mins, baby
Or else the mango smoothie gets sipped
My Tots:
*Greta Thunberg how dare you gif*
I’ll be there in seven, you barbarian.
***
“I’m here. Hand over the smoothie and no one gets hurt.”