ALIA
Madness and purpose are two sides of the same coin.
Is it madness I flew to Vegas to prove a point? Can I blame it on temporary insanity that I low-key stalked the man who’s been making my uterus cry ever since we met, all the way to a swanky nightclub, hoping to entice him to come back to my hotel room with me?
Yes.
Am I utterly crazy to think I can pull off a sexcapade with my cousin’s teammate, while staying in the same hotel as him and his entire team, without being discovered? I’ll give you one guess.
Maybe the universe is looking out for me, because I’ve managed not only to avoid a run-in with the Ironhearts but, most importantly, with Rohan as well. The relief of finding Cal sitting alone at the bar was only slightly less than the rush of attraction that nearly maimed me when I first saw him.
We’ve not spoken since leaving the club, but my entire body feels attuned to his every breath. The slightest brush of his arm makes me tremble, his scent a drug that consumes me. At this rate, I’ll combust before we make it to our floor.
His palm rests low on my back, over the dress he visibly appreciated. The way his eyes linger on me and the fact that I’ve caught him checking me out multiple times gives me hope I made the right choice coming here today.
My anger after speaking with Namik drove me to this decision, but the closer we get to my room, the more my adrenaline dwindles. The elevator ping snaps me to the present. Cal possessively links his fingers with mine, as if he’s afraid I’ll escape.
I lead him down the hallway, hair pricking the back of my neck as I sense him tracking me the entire time. I concentrate a tad too hard on tapping the keycard against the blinking panel. The whirr and unlatching of the electronic lock feel distant through the furious buzz in my ear.
Lights flicker on as we enter the room. Within seconds, I find myself spun around with my back pressed against the cool wall, trapped between the arms of a very aroused man.
My entire body crackles with energy, my skin prickling from the heat of his proximity. He watches me for two seconds, like he’s memorizing me, before lowering his head. No words are exchanged when his mouth captures mine in a bruising kiss, a growl of satisfaction rumbling deep within his chest. The mere sound has moisture quickly gathering between my legs as I tilt my head back, opening my mouth when his tongue dips in with a familiarity I’m quickly learning to recognize. His hands slide down my naked back, one thumb dipping into the low ‘U’ right above my ass.
And I can’t help it. I stiffen.
Callum notices, because he ends our kiss just as quickly. “Alia?”
I try to get my erratic heartbeat under control along with my nerves. I want this. I’msoattracted to him. I truly want to let myself feel desired and enjoy the touch of another human.
Cupping his neck with both hands, I rise up on my toes, hoping to kiss him again to distract myself. A moment later, his lips pluck at mine, his hands now massaging either side of my hips before one draws up my sides, approaching my breast.
Almost immediately, a sound of distress tears from my throat, my shoulders rising as my body goes rigid. Callum backs away, hands raised, like he’s been burned. His brows clash as he observes me, trying to make sense of what’s happening. “What’s wrong?”
“N-no. Nothing.” I stumble over my words, unsure how to explain it. He’s touched me before but here, alone, within these four walls with a massive bed waiting a few feet away, the reality of what I’m about to do thrusts my mind into overdrive. I’m struggling to fight and knock down the destructive array of thoughts rushing my brain.
“Give me a moment, please. I’m fine. I can do this,” I ramble.
“You’re shaking. Why?”
His fingers clasp my palm, his thumb rubbing soothing circles into it. I stare at him, my mouth dry, my breath stuck. Can I really reveal something I’ve never told anyone? Not even Irsia? What if he thinks differently of me afterward?
Cal notices my distress because he slips a finger under my chin and tilts my face up until our eyes meet. “It’s just me.”
Just? There is nothingjustabout him. He’s this perfect man who everyone adores. And he’s choosing to be here withme, without a single clue what a mess I am. His look of concern makes my guilt spike.
Why would he pick me? Why should he have to deal with my mess? I’m going back to India in a couple months anyway. Why am I wasting his time? To my horror, my eyes fill up.
“I don’t know how to do this,” I whisper.
“This?”
“S-sex.”
The silence is painfully long and the pressure within my head threatens to break me.
“I—” He releases a confused breath. “You were married.”
I tamp down my panic to answer him. “I lost my virginity to him the night of the wedding. But it was. . . perfunctory.”