Me:
Sorry, I was surprised you replied.
Hockey Boy:
Who hasn’t replied to you?
Give me the name
Me:
Stand down, Hockey Boy.
I only meant I’ve never gotten a reply this quickly.
Hockey Boy:
You must not have very good friends
Ouch. He’s not wrong.
Hockey Boy:
Except for me. I’m the most awesome friend you’llever have.
Awesomer than awesome
awesomest
superlative in my awesomeness
Me:
I hope you live in a home big enough for you and your ego.
Hockey Boy:
You asking for an invitation?
Me:
Why would I want to be subjected to you and your ego?
Hockey Boy:
’cause we’re charming as fuck
Me:
I’m regretting texting you and feeding into this narrative.
Hockey Boy:
You already admitted you adore me
Me:
I was protecting your fragile masculinity.