“Yes, it is,” she urged. “Domenico is actually one of the good guys.”
“Good guys? In the Mafia? What, he only killed five instead of a hundred or he kills ever so gently without torturing them first?”
Her head tilted as she sucked in a hiss. “Actually, neither. Il Coyote is the Lanzas’ enforcer, which means he’s even more vicious than his capo himself. I mean, why someone like The Cutter would need an enforcer unless he could do more damage than…” She trailed off when she met my widened gaze. Maybe she finally realized describing the monstrosity of Domenico—The fucking Coyote?—wasn’t going to help her case. A silly grin stretched her mouth. “Maybe good wasn’t the right word to say here, but who needs a good guy anyway?”
My eyes widened even more if that was possible. “I do! How could you even… Listen, Sis, if I ever consider being with a guy, I want him to be good and boring. A skinny nerd or a fucking accountant with a dad bod. Love me one of those.”
She rolled her eyes. “No, you don’t. You’ve been surrounded by those at school for three years now. If that was what you wanted, you would date one of them already. I know exactly what your type is, and it is Domenico.”
“The fuck?”
“You know he looks like this actor you—”
“Don’t say it,” I hissed.
“—masturbate to his Mafia movie every night.”
“I so hate you right now.”
“No, you don’t. You love me.”
I grumbled.
“Do you know why they call him Dom?”
“Short for Domenico, duh.”
She shook her head slowly, a shit-eating grin on her face. “Not just that. He’s like,” she stretched on her toes to whisper in my ear, “the Rocco Siffredi of the Mob.”
“Lina! Holy…” I threw my hands in the air, and then I chuckled in disbelief. Who was this girl and what did she do with my innocent sister? “How do you even know who Rocco Siffredi is? Tino lets you watch porn?”
“Uh, no way. If he knew, he’d bring poor Rocco here, chop off his giant penis and feed it to him before he’d set him on fire in front of my eyes, and then I’d get a heavy, good old spanking for weeks.” She mused for a second, as if she was picturing the gruesome scenario, and then she smiled.
“Good God, would you actually like that?”
“Not the Rocco part, but the spanking…” She bit her lip, color flooding her cheeks.
“Eeeeeew.”
“Hey, don’t kinkshame me. Tino is so good with—”
“I don’t wanna know! God.” Knowing how that psycho fucked my sister was the last thing I needed to hear tonight. Ever. “But if he’s that good, why are you watching porn?”
“Educational purposes. I was clueless in that department, and Tino is…Tino. Have you seen the man? I needed to keep up.”
“Again, eeeeeew.”
She chuckled. “Listen, I know it’s against the rules, but I think Tino can make an exception for you two dating if Domenico makes it official.”
“Wow, wow, wow, hold on. What in the actual fuck?”
“I know, I know! Believe me, I’m not telling you to marry Dom. I’m just saying to give him a chance, date him, go slow, as slowly as you want, but for that to happen, I don’t think you can keep it a secret, sneaking around. With how protective Tino can get of you, Dom can get in trouble. I mean, I don’t even think Tino would agree to you casually dating, but he’d allow him to be your boyfriend if Dom showed genuine interest in…you know.Butthere will be no actual commitment here, Nicky. If you don’t like Dom or wanna stop seeing him for any reason, you can just break it off. It’s okay whenyoudo it. Tino won’t suspect anything.”
My eyes tightened at her. “So what, you want Domenico to propose and be my fake fiancé while I keep him in the dark so Daddy Tino approves of us dating? And then I just break off the engagement when I’m done using the guy?”
“Uh… It sounds mean when you put it that way, but kinda…yeah.”
“Why the fuck would I do that? Not that I’d ever date that huge…I mean tall, arrogant, monstrous, asshole Mafioso, or any Mafioso whatsoever, but if I want to date Domenico, I’ll date Domenico. Those fucking rules don’t apply to me. I’m not a Mafia princess.”