Thoughts of Melissa’s words and the night of the graduation party will not stop turning in my mind as I get lost filling the right mountainside with trees—just mindless strokes since it doesn’t have my full attention.
I can still feel the butterflies his fingers elicited. The way his Adam’s apple bobbed when he’d glance at my lips, the way he’d pull me back against his chest.
She’s right.
I can’t hide behind his flirty persona anymore.You’re in denial. Cliche thought, but nonetheless, right on the mark. Has it always been this way and I’ve just been oblivious? Could everybody see it but me? Obviously, Mom and Dad could see something.
I think back further into our high school years. I was a perpetual dater. I didn’t fly though guys or anything, but I had a serious relationship on and off throughout the four years. I dated sporadically after high school as well. Landon was besideme, always there to pick up the pieces after every breakup. Even had my back with a couple of real jerks. He always said I picked some “winners”.
Sigh...Has nothing ever worked for me because of me? Or rather, was I always just choosing the wrong guy when the right one was hiding in plain sight? How the hell am I supposed to test Melissa’s theory?
“Okay, class, that’s it for today. Make sure your sketches are finished by the end of the week.” Our professor tips down his glasses and pointedly eyes one of the jocks up front who in turn lifts his shoulders and throws back a, “What’s that supposed to mean?”. The majority of the class breaks into laughter as we all shuffle our shit to bags and head out the door.