“You know a lot of people here,” Kieran said after a minute.
“This is true.”
“And they know you.”
“Yes.”
“I like that.”
I glanced at him. “Dressed like that, you look as though you’re part of this.”
His eyes met mine, and there was a steadiness to him that I hadn’t seen before.
I likedthat.
By the time we reached the bar, it was already full to overflowing, men spilling out onto the street, cigar smoke pervading the air, the sound of voices filling it. It was the kind of space where people chose to stand close together. I left him outside while I went to the bar, and when I returned, he was standing there, taking everything in.
I handed him his glass, then let my hand rest on his nape, stroking him gently, loving how he leaned into my touch.
I raised my glass. “To your education.”
He grinned. “I’m beginning to think I should’ve asked for a syllabus.”
I took a sip of my drink, acutely aware of how close we were standing now, that this space was no longer just mine.
He was in it with me, and he hadn’t stepped back once.
“All good?” I asked.
Kieran nodded. “Yes.” Then he added in a quieter tone, “Very.” Then he pulled his phone from his bag and peered at it.
“Something important?”
He smiled. “It’s a text from Karl.” He read aloud “Do I expect you back this evening?”
“Do you want to go back to his place?”
Say no. Say no.
He gazed at me for a moment. “No.” He typed quickly. A second or two later, his phone buzzed, and he chuckled. “Karl said ‘I thought that might be the answer. Have a good time.’”
I held his gaze for a second longer, aware of the shift within me. I knew what lay at the heart of it.
At some point, you stop wondering if someone will stay, and start recognising that they already have.
Chapter Seventeen
September 5
Kieran
“What wouldyou like to do today?” Stefan asked over coffee.
My mind went instantly to Karl. “To be honest, I’m feeling a little guilty. I’ve hardly spent five minutes with Karl since I got here.” He’d sent a text about an hour ago, asking if I’d like to go on a bus tour of Berlin.
Stefan put down his mug. “Tomorrow is the street fair. I was hoping to show you around it, if that’s okay.”
I beamed. “I was going to ask about that. Yes, that would be great.”