I understand it now.I wasn’t leaving empty-handed.
But I’m not leaving with answers either. And somehow, that felt worse.
I closed my eyes again, letting the motion of the train carry me forward whether I was ready for it or not.
There’s no going back now.
There was only whatever came next.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Kieran
Manchester hadn’t changed.
The sky was still the same flat grey, the kind that never quite decided whether it was going to rain or not. I’d walked out of Piccadilly Station and straight into a taxi, functioning on autopilot. The landscape was nothing more than a blur as we sped along.
My mind was still in Berlin.
We pulled up outside my building, and I paid the driver. I stepped out of the taxi and stood for a moment on the pavement, my suitcase at my feet, my keys in my hand. Everything seemed exactly as it had been when I’d left.
Except that wasn’t true. Something felt… off. Misaligned. On the surface, everything worked, but underneath, nothing fit in quite the same way.
I let myself into the flat, then set my bag down inside the door and closed it behind me. Just like that, I was back, and the space was too quiet.
“Alexa, play Beethoven’s Moonlight Sonata.”
Seconds later, the familiar melody filled the air, and I breathed a little easier. During the flight, waiting for the train, the taxi ride, I’d been turning over the events of the past two weeks, and I’d finally arrived at a conclusion I was happy with.
Not everything needs to be resolved. Some things—some feelings—can exist exactly as they are, unfinished, uncertain, but nevertheless real.
I resisted the urge to check my phone. No messages had come through, and I told myself it didn’t matter.
If he wants to reach out, he will.
And if he didn’t?
That would tell me all I needed to know.
When thepingsounded, my heart skipped a beat. I unlocked my phone and?—
Of course it was Karl.
Karl: Did you make it back in one piece?
I laughed. “Yeah,” I muttered. “Course you’d check.” I typed back.
Me: Alive. Just about. Manchester is exactly as grey as I remember. Unfortunately.
The reply came quickly.
Karl: Ah, I remember it well. And I don’t miss it.
I smiled at that, then flopped onto the couch. At some point I needed coffee, but it could wait.
Me: You were right, by the way.
Three dots appeared almost immediately. Paused. Disappeared. Then?—