I could do it. I could tell him that this is too much, that I’m trying too hard not to fall for him, and that I can’t give him any more time. I’d end it because the last thing I’d ever do is give him an ultimatum.
Grayson pushes his hair back, revealing the glasses I love.
“Did I do something wrong?”
I grab my jeans. “Nope. Nothing.”Not a lie. He warned me about this.
He looks down and sighs. “Then why are you getting dressed so quickly and still zoning out? I know that face, and it means your mind is about to implode.” His arm reaches out for me. “Emma?—”
I step back, buttoning my pants. “I just need to go.”
He moves swiftly and drops me onto the mattress, giving me a languid kiss before setting me back on my feet, making the room spin. “Happy Thanksgiving.”
Grayson thought that would make me feel better, but it only confirmed what I’ve been thinking. “I don’t think I can wait anymore,” I practically whisper.
His head tilts. “What do you mean?”
“I mean, I can’t keep waiting for you. For this.” I raise a hand and gesture between us.
His brow furrows, pain etching his features. “Emma?—”
“I thought I was cut out for this, but I’m obviously not. It’s only been a month and a half since we spoke about our terms, and that in itself is not a long time. But that’s not the only thing.” I continue my stream of thoughts, needing to get this off my chest. “I’m not blaming you either. The lines have blurred on both ends. Sometimes this feels like a relationship, and other times just sex. But for the last two weeks, since the night you picked me up from the frat house and took care of me, something’s changed. I see it. Ifeelit.” Grayson stares at me, something akin to nerves and sadness in his eyes. “Like that!” I point to his face, and both his eyebrows rise. “You’re looking at me with gentler eyes, just like the morning after you took care of me. When you admitted you had a crush on me.”
“I do have a crush on you,” he says in a low voice.
My smile is bittersweet. “I know you do, but my crush isn’t a passing infatuation like yours may be. I promised that I’d tell you if I could no longer wait for you.” I shrug, letting out a humorless laugh. “This is me telling you, and I’m not going to make you choose a path. You’d have told me by now if you wanted something more. So…” I pick up my purse and move to where my coat is hung in the living room of his small one-bedroom house with one of the most amazing kitchens I’ve ever seen. Grayson’s footsteps sound behind me. “I’m going to go, and we can be friends. I’ll text you once the article’s out next week.”
“Emma—”
“Grayson, it’s okay?—”
“Will you just shut the hell up so I can kiss you?” He doesn’t wait for me to reply. Instead, he wraps me in his arms and gives me the most passionate kiss I’ve ever experienced. His lips move in a slow embrace, our tongues dancing together, and whatever this kiss means—whatever I’m feeling—I feel it in the marrow of my bones.
I moan softly, already having lost my train of thought, and he pulls away.
Our eyes lock, and he smiles. “Okay.”
“Okay?” I say, confused, because I didn’t ask a question.
“Let’s do this thing. For now, we can date away from the public eye because of your article. I know you don’t want people at the paper to think of you differently, but come January, we’ll tell a dean that it happened over winter break.” My heart skips a beat, and I’m left speechless. “After all this secretive bullshit is over, that’s when I’ll ask you to be my girlfriend properly.”
Is this really happening?
“Why wait to ask?”
Grayson smirks. “Because, Princess, asking you here and now isn’t how I want to do it.
I’ve been picturing how to ask you to be my girlfriend since the night we met, and it sure as hell wasn’t when we were in a secret relationship. However, you are romantically and sexually mine just as I am yours. You no longer need to wait for that kind of commitment.” He brushes a finger along my cheek, and I lean into his touch.
My heart tightens as the walls of ice I’ve built up for months slowly melt away. “So, we’re dating?”
“Yes.”
“As in romantically, feelings and all of that?”
“Yes.”
“And in January, we can come out as boyfriend and girlfriend?”