‘She loved you, you know,’ she said sniffing loudly into an old tissue. ‘She really loved you. She kept this funny old rabbit thing, for years …’
‘William.’
‘Yeah. That’s right. She took him everywhere. She had a party once and someone kidnapped him as a joke, and put him up for ransom, but she didn’t think it was even slightly amusing. Oh no. She just lost it entirely. You should’ve seen her – screaming and crying. It was like that rabbit … I don’t know, like he represented something to her that nobody else could ever have understood.’
It fell silent for a moment and Ana took in deep breaths, trying to control the overwhelming emotion chargingthrough her system, trying to rein in the pain and force it back into the Pandora’s box that Lol had inadvertently opened up. It was the first time she’d cried since her father’s funeral.
She glanced around the flat, at the fuchsia walls and leopardskin curtains, the piles of clothes and shoes, perfume and jewellery. She looked at the photos pinned to the walls, smiling groups of people, small children, family. And then her eye was caught by a photo of Lol and Bee, arms round each other, champagne on a table in front of them, beaming at the camera, and Ana suddenly remembered why she was here.
‘John?’ she said, sitting up straight. ‘Where’s the cat?’
‘Oh. Right. He’s – out.’
‘Out?’
‘Yeah. You know. Out. Doing … cat stuff.’ She shrugged and got to her feet. ‘Listen – don’t go anywhere, right? I’m just going to check the stairwell and the street for that fucking stupid choker. I don’t really give a shit about it myself, but if someone found it and made off wi’ it, I’d be fucked. What are you doing tonight, by the way?’
Ana shrugged and sniffed. ‘Going home. I’m catching a train in an hour.’
Lol stopped still, her mouth opened wide and her eyes staring at her with exaggerated shock. She put her hands on her skinny hips and addressed Ana, sternly. ‘No you are not, young lady.’
‘I’m sorry?’
‘I’ve been hearing about you for years. I’ve wanted to meet you for, like,ever.You can’t go home yet. You’reBee’s fucking sister. D’you have any idea how exciting that is?’
‘Yes, but …’
‘Yes but nothing. You’re staying here and I’m taking you out.’
‘Yes, but – what about my mother?’
‘What about your mother?’
‘She’s ill. She needs me. I can’t just leave her.’
Lol smiled a warm smile and put her hand on Ana’s shoulder. ‘Look,’ she said kindly, ‘I know all about your mother. Bee told me everything. And I think your mother might benefit from a night alone. Oh – come on. Please stay. Ple-ease,’ she wheedled. ‘We’ll go and check out old Lundarn Tan, togevver, like.’ She smiled as she tried on a daft cockney accent.
Ana’s thoughts veered dizzyingly between her sense of responsibility towards her mother and the realization that she wanted to stay. That she really wanted to stay. She wanted to be with Lol. She wanted to talk to Lol. All night. About Bee. About cottages and motorbikes and guitars. She wanted to go out with Lol. And get drunk. And not go home. Not tonight. She wasn’t ready yet. A wall of resolve built in her chest. She was already nodding, without being aware of it, her mouth set hard, her hands wringing together. ‘OK,’ she said firmly, ‘OK. I’ll stay.’
‘Good girl,’ grinned Lol, squeezing her shoulders, ‘top girl. I’ll be back in a tick.’
‘I need to phone my mum, though. Can I use your phone?’
‘’Course you can. It’s over there.’ Lol pointed at the window sill and smiled at Ana excitedly. ‘I can’t believeit,’ she gushed, ‘Bee’s sister. In my flat. I’m so excited!’ Lol squeezed her shoulders again and then went clattering down the stairs like a … like a skinny six-foot woman in wedge heels.
Ana walked to the window and found herself peering down through the sunroof and into the leather interior of a big black Lexus. She fiddled with her hair as she dialled her mother’s number. The answerphone clicked on after two rings.
‘Hi, Mum, it’s me,’ she began. ‘I’m just phoning to say that I won’t be home tonight. I’m staying another night. With a friend of Bee’s. Everything’s fine and I’ll, er, see you tomorrow.’ And then she hung up and felt her insides go all fizzy with the excitement of rebellion and change. Below her, the front door opened and then there was Lol, out in the street, peering at the pavement. The bright sunshine glittered off the rhinestones on her leather trousers and gleamed off her flawless skin. She was the most extraordinary-looking woman Ana had ever seen. And she wore her stature so differently to Ana – her shoulders back, her head erect, her heels high – almost like she wasproudof her height.
She gripped the window frame and then noticed some thing nestled within the folds of curtain at her feet. An intricate band of turquoise feathers and translucent green beads threaded on to a delicate wire. A choker. She picked it up, feeling her spirits lift with the pleasure of being useful.
‘Lol!’ she called into the stiflingly hot street, ‘your cunting choker!’ Lol looked up at her and cackled. She cupped her hands together and Ana let the choker fall into them.
‘Ana’, she grinned, ‘I think I love you!’ She kissed the choker and fastened it around her long, thin neck. A group of boys who’d been skateboarding all came to a grinding halt as they saw her walk elegantly back up the steps and into the house. They scooped up their skateboards and stared at her. Ana waited for one of them to say something. But they didn’t. They just watched. And it wasn’t until the door had closed behind her and she was half-way up the stairs that one of the boys spoke. He opened his mouth big and wide and emitted a single, breathless, overawed word:
‘WO-OW!’
9