The locker room noise blurred at the edges. Guys moving around, laughing, showering, planning dinner. Life continuing like it always did, fast and loud and easy for people who didn’t have to think about where they fit inside it.
I sat there in the middle of it, wrapped hands resting on my thighs, and let the quiet settle behind my ribs. The rebuild pressure hung over us like frost you couldn’t scrape off. The team wanted a new identity. A clean slate. A future that didn’t look anything like the last few seasons.
And I was the part that didn’t fit clean into that.
Too old for the reset.
Too visible to ignore.
Too easy to blame when something tipped the wrong way.
The headline waiting to happen.
I exhaled slowly through my nose.
Across the room, Oliver caught my eye. He didn’t lookaway. Just held it for a second, steady, like he was making sure I was still here. Still in it.
Ty yelled something stupid across the room. Jonah laughed. Cam’s voice cut through the noise, lighter now, like nothing had happened.
I dropped my gaze back to my hands.
Wrapped. Controlled. Functional.
That was the job.
That was always the job.
The world saw the hit. The fight. The moment.
They didn’t see the line before it. The decision. The reason.
By morning, my name would be trending again for all the wrong reasons. I’d tell myself I didn’t care. Then I’d get up before dawn. Make real coffee. Move my body like it still belonged to me. Do the work.
Because if I didn’t—if I stopped, even for a second—if I let the quiet underneath it all get too loud—I’m running out of time—I didn’t know what would be left.
CHAPTER 4
BEA
A FEW MONTHS AGO
The chai had gone cold twenty minutes ago.
I knew because I’d taken a sip out of habit, expecting warmth, expecting something grounding—and instead got lukewarm spice and milk that sat wrong on my tongue. It clung there, coating everything in a way that felt… unfinished.
Like the rest of my life.
I set the cup down harder than necessary, ceramic clicking against the table, and forced my attention back to my laptop screen.
Sports Crisis Management and Communication — Final Paper
Case Study Draft #4
I stared at the paragraph I’d written, reading the same sentence for the fifth time without absorbing a single word.
In high-profile athlete misconduct scenarios, the organization must respond within the first twenty-four hours with acontrolled narrative that acknowledges the issue without escalating liability?—
“You’re not listening.” Micah’s gaze sharpened on me, the shift immediate. Subtle. But there.