Lord knew I’d shed a few during the journey, especially when I’d managed to get hold of Xander. My flatmate at uni, we’d formed an instant connection. He’d seen me at my lowest, picking me up and dusting me off more times than I could count.
Aside from the fucked-up triangle that was me, Dom, and Max, Xander was the only one who knew the fulltruth of what had happened. He’d patiently listened to me break down tonight, just as I had all those times in the past. I’d tried not to, but fear was about as logical as love.
Which is to say, not at all.
When Frank released me, I followed him through into the kitchen.
“I made a pot of tea, but it’s probably cold by now. Let me get a fresh one brewing.”
My hands weren’t the only ones shaking. Frank’s were vibrating so hard that the lid shook in its ceramic casing.
“Here,” I said, taking it from his hands. Now that I was here, now I had a purpose, I could focus. “Sit. I’ll do it.”
He slumped into a chair and dropped his head into his hands. “I can’t cope with this, Ryan.”
I was silent as I emptied the pot and filled the kettle. I didn’t know what to say. I couldn’t cope either. I doubted tea would fix anything, but at least it gave me something to do.
When the tea was brewing, I slid into the seat opposite him. Between us, Frank’s mobile lay silent and still. “Did they say when they’d give an update?”
Frank shook his head, silver lining his eyes. “They didn’t sound optimistic, but said they’d give a call when he was out of surgery.”
He’d been in surgery an hour when Frank had called me. Thanks to my dangerous driving, it’d only taken me ninety minutes to make it there. Two and a half hours made sense for life-saving surgery, right? If anything, I’d expect it to be a while yet before we heard anything. “Okay. Let’s take that as a good sign. No news is good news.”
Frank gave me a clipped nod, wringing his hands together on the tabletop. “Yeah. Suppose it is.”
He asked me a few questions about my conference. Ianswered them as fully as I could, but honestly, there was only so much I could say about the latest updates in tax. After that, we moved on to chit-chat about my mum and how she was doing following the divorce, then Xander’s experiences on board his new ship, before finishing up with plans for our next fishing trip.
All in all, it took up another hour.
After that, we lapsed into silence, the unimaginable looming over our heads.
The sun was rising before Frank spoke again. The teapot was empty, our cups long forgotten. I wished for something stronger, but I’d never do that in front of Frank, especially not at a time like this.
“What if I never get the chance to earn his forgiveness?”
“You will.” I slid my hand across the table to clasp his. “He’s a fighter. He doesn’t quit.”
Except when it came to our relationship.
“Dominic—” I swallowed painfully after saying his name. I was so careful to never let it leave my lips that it felt almost foreign. “He’ll pull through this. He will.”
He had to. Whether or not he’d ever come back here was another story.
As for giving his dad a chance to apologise… Well, I couldn’t see that happening. Not when he was unaware of the lengths his dad had gone to in sorting out his life. That it was Dominic’s leaving that had finally woken him from his grief slumber and encouraged him to live again.
Frank nodded, but I could tell he didn’t believe me.
Dominic has to pull through. He has to.
I wouldn’t cope if he didn’t.
It was funny, I hadn’t thought Dominic had the power to cause me any further pain.
Judging by how I was feelingnow, I’d been sorelymistaken.Even thousands of miles away, I was being torn in half.
Silence hung over us like a heavy cloak once more. Frank didn’t take his hand out of mine, and I didn’t move either.
We sat there, two statues eroding in a storm, waiting to find out how our world would lookwhen it finally passed. Would we be merely weathered or left crumbling into dust?