Amazing how easily Xander had found the time, but Dominic never had.
Xander lifted his head at the sound of the car door closing, and a broad grin spread over his handsome face. “Ryan!”
I crushed him in a hug, his arms wrapping around me just as tightly. “Fuck, I missed you, man.”
“I know. All men, women, and enbys of the UK have been mourning my loss. But fear not, everyone, for I have returned.”
I pulled back to punch him in the shoulder. “Humble as ever, I see.”
Xander’s brown eyes danced with humour. “Why mess with perfection?”
I tugged his case from his hand, leaving him to pick up the backpack that was the same size as him. “Still can’t get over you being able to pack your whole life into these things.”
“Why is that a surprise?”
I rolled my eyes at him as we hauled everything into the boot. “Because at uni, half your shit ended up in my room because you had no space for it in yours.”
“Well, I spent half my time in there anyway, so it made sense.”
“To you,” I said pointedly as we got into the car. “Because it was easierfor you.”
Xander sighed dramatically as he slid into the passenger seat. “Listen, I can’t be completely perfect. That wouldn’t be fair to everyone else.”
I barked out a laugh as I merged smoothly with the traffic leaving the airport. Just having my best friend next to me had some of the tension of the past few weeks lessening. With Xander back, I’d finally have someone in my corner. Someone I could be completely honest with and know that they’d tell me what I needed to hear, rather than what I might want.
Xander let out a low whistle as he tapped the dashboard. “You upgraded the Focus to this fancy beast?”
“It died on me,” I said gloomily. My old car had been well past its prime, but it had been my first car. I’d coaxed it through every wheeze and cough until it gave up entirely. “And this isn’t fancy—it’s a Volvo.”
“A fancy Volvo.”
“I think being on a ship for so long warped your perception.”
“Possibly true.” Xander stretched in his seat. “But that’s me done now.”
“And you’re definitely okay about it?”
Joining the navy had been his dream ever since I’d known him. He’d only bothered with uni to satisfy his parents’ demands.
“Yep,” he said breezily. Too breezily. “Time for a new challenge.”
I shot a sideways glance at him, noting how he was digging his fingers into his thighs. My lips thinned at the sight. I didn’t believe his decision not to re-up was as simple as he made out. “I’m here if you want to talk. You know that, right?”
“I do, Ryan.” He stared out the window, his knuckles white. “You’re a good friend, you know?”
I glanced at my mirror as I joined the motorway. “I’m your best friend, and don’t ever forget it.”
Unlike Dom, I’d never had to share Xander. We’d met the day we moved into halls and that had been it. The cocky, sarcastic, loud-mouthed little shit that was Xander had looked at me and gone ‘Yep. That one.’
Half of me wished I’d been able to fall in love with him. But by the time we met, someone else had already laid claim to my heart.
It wasn’t mine to give away anymore, and Dominic would never give it up.
The other half of me was glad of it. Because in truth, I knew no one would ever love me like Dominic did. Which was a good thing, because it meant no one would break me the same way either.
“No Kate?” Xander asked, bringing me back to the present. “I was half expecting her to come with you to pick me up.”
“She’s working,” I said, another rush of guilt coursingthrough me. Kate was the one I was meant to love, not Dom. And I did love her, just in a different way. A healthy, manageable way. The love I had for her would never overwhelm me. It wouldn’t cloud thoughts of everyone else. It wouldn’t make it so I couldn’t think, couldn’t exist without her presence.