Even if it was just from the shadows.
26
Ryan
I didn’t know how long I stared at the closed door after Dom walked through it. Long enough for my muscles to grow stiff and cold. It didn’t matter how long I waited.
Dom didn’t return.
It was stupid. I knew he wasn’t going to. He’d told me how he felt. What he wanted. The lengths to which he was willing to go to get it.
Then he’d left it in my hands. My useless, incapable hands.
I only knew I was crying from the dampness on my cheeks. What the fuck was wrong with me? Dom was hurting, and I was the only one who could fix it.
So what the fuck was stopping me?
It was a pointless question. Everything I’d said to Dom was true. I had made a promise to Kate, a commitment. I had no idea how to break that. The wedding was the day after tomorrow, for fuck’s sake. Was I really the kind of man who left someone at the altar?
No. I wasn’t.
But I didn’t think I could give Dom up either.
A door opened, but it was further down the hall. Clipped footsteps drifted closer until a big arm wrapped around my shoulders. “Come on, mate. Let’s sit you down.”
I let Xander lead me to the sofa. “You heard all that?”
“I tried not to, but you were both pretty loud.” There was no hint of his usual grin, just a quiet determination. “Reading between the lines, I’m guessing he was somehow there this week?”
I gave a clipped nod. “It was a mix of kidnapping and gatecrashing.”
“What about Frank?”
I sighed as I sank down on the sofa. “Who do you think helped Dom plan it?”
“Git,” Xander said, sitting beside me. “So…you slept with him?”
I glared at my best friend. “If you’re about to judge me or make me feel shitty about cheating on Kate, you can fuck off.”
I already felt bad enough about what I’d done. I didn’t regret it though…I think that was the worst part.
The truth was, in the same situation, I’d make the exact same choices. I wouldn’t give up what we’d shared this week for the world.
“I’m not going to do that.” Xander clasped his hands together as he leaned on his knees. “Do you want to talk about it?”
I closed my eyes as a headache began to throb at my temples. “I really don’t.”
“Okay.”
There was a creak as Xander left the sofa. A few seconds later, he kicked my ankle until I opened my eyes to glare at him. “What?”
“Well, you don’t want to talk,” he said, holding up a glass, “so how about drowning your sorrows instead?”
I reached for the glass before remembering that night long ago when I’d used booze to try and suffocate my feelings. “Nah, I’m good.”
There was a knock at my door. I sucked in a breath at the thought that it might be Dom.
“Let me get it,” Xander said, kindly but firmly pressing me down on the sofa. “I doubt it’s Dom, but if it is, I’ll send him right in.”