I… I want to beme.
He didn’t push, he stood patiently holding my hand in his until the name came tumbling out of me. “Molly…” I cleared my throat, “My name is Molly.”
A wide smile broke out across his face, “It is good to finally meet you Molly.”
He gave my hand a squeeze, then turned it and brought it up to his lips. He gave me the softest of kisses before stepping away saying, “I won't take up more of your morning, I just wanted to stop by and introduce myself.”
“Oh… ok.” I felt stunned.
Declan turned and made his way to the doorway, before turning around and saying, “I will be seeing you soon Molly.”
“You will?” I asked, because apparently I was broken and that was the most I could get out.
He gave me a wide smile and said, “See you soon, Molly.”
And with that… again. He turned and walked away from me. I was left confused and rubbing that spot in my chest that was feeling less of an ache and more of that spark… that hint of hope.
CHAPTER 45
DECLAN - PROMISE
When Angel had told me he had found my wife and had possibly made things worse, I had a one-track mind. Find her, make sure she was safe, whole… I needed to see her, and everything else would come secondary. I didn’tthink…period. I didn’t think. Not about how she would take the news, about how she would react to seeing me again, I didn’t think about her losing her identity and what that meant.
So while my entire being was focused on getting to her, seeing her, telling her all the things I had done over the months we had been apart… She had been dealing with the loss of her identity, with so many things that I had never even considered, because my focus was on eliminating all threats.
There was a look that went over her face when I had told her I had eliminated every threat to her, that she was safe. And I realized that wasn’t true, because I stood before her as Clutch, as a member of the Dawnbreakers MC… and we had hurt her; I had betrayed her.
I was so consumed, focused on seeing her and what that would feel like for me…
But watching my beautiful wife struggle, seeing her so uncertain in her own skin, I knew there was only one option for me. To finish what I started in eliminating every threat to her, keeping her safe.
It killed me, but I drove away from her because I knew exactly what I had to do. I knew what I had to let go of so that I had a chance to be with her again. And what I had learned in the months after she had left me was that I didn’t want to exist in a world that didn’t have her. So if it meant that I needed to say goodbye to the only home I had ever felt safe in, to the identity that had kept me safe since I was seventeen… I didn’t hesitate.
I drove to the clubhouse, parked and walked straight to Angel's office. I knocked and walked in to Ledger, Cypher and Axel scattered around the space. Angel stood from his desk when he saw me walk in. “How did it go?”
“Well, he’s back already…” Ledger hedged.
I didn’t hesitate. “I need out.”
The room went quiet until Angel broke the silence, “I don’t think I heard you right.”
“I think you did.” I stood tall, knowing that there weren't usually men who walked away from this life.
Everyone in the room was standing now.
“You have every right to decide how I leave this Club, but Iwillbe leaving.” I didn’t take my eyes off of Angel.
“But you did everything to make it safe to come back… we all did.” Axel spoke for the first time.
“That’s what I thought, too. But I showed up at the only place she was safe wearing my cut, from the club who betrayed her.”
I let that sit with everyone before I continued, “I said I would eliminate any threat to her, I would remove anyone who had hurt her, who she perceived as a threat...”
Everyone was nodding in agreement, but they stopped when I said, “Except us. I showed up telling her what a great man I was because I eliminated threats to her but the way she looked at my cut… the way she froze when I told her she could come back.”
No one said anything for a while and then Angel blew past me calling for church. I entered that room expecting a fight, expecting a struggle. What I didn’t expect was support.
Angel asked what I needed and beyond leaving the club and going back to her a different man I hadn't thought about it. So together the club came up with the idea of showing up as a club and showing their support for me walking away from it. Showing her that she meant more to me than a patch, my past or my bike.