I needed space and I wanted to go check in on Four and Dani, so I put my half drunk beer down and turned back to Meg. “I am heading to Four’s, did you need a ride?”
Without a word, Cypher turned and walked away. Meg watched after him, a conflicted look on her face. “Thanks, Clutch… I am going to stay, but I will come with you tomorrow.”
“Ya?” I asked, knowing that if she was joining us on a run that was as good as patching in.
Her eyes trailed across the empty room, then she looked up at me, “I didn’t say anything, Ididn’tdo anything. I want to be there for this… forhertoo.”
I didn’t know how to handle what she just said, didn’t know if I could get words out around the sudden pulse of emotions running through me. So I gave her a nod and turned making my way through the clubhouse and out into the cool October night.
Tomorrow I would take another step in making sure Bex could live the life she dreamed of, I would make it safe for her to come home.
CHAPTER 37
- JUST LIKE THAT
The rhythm of heavy breathing and my gloved fists hitting the heavy bag had become the only thing to calm the building anxiety I’d been feeling. I didn’t know where it came from, but it hadn't let up since that morning I woke up with that phantom pain.
Without work or really even an identity, a purpose. I had been spending most of my time at the gym with Trevor. My old identity was burned; it wasn’t safe for me to go back to being Molly… and even if I could…who was she? Who would I be next?
Living your life in constant fear, knowing that you couldn’t let your guard down… it was exhausting. A deep-seated feeling that even sleep couldn’t cure.
Maybe I should go far away, get a new identity and go somewhere where my past had no way of catching up to me… no way to find me.An ache settled into my chest whenever that thought crossed my mind. I stopped punching, took a few deep breaths, and instinctively rubbed at the spot.
Trevor came out of the back office, talking to a few of the guys on his way over to me. A few of the regulars had asked questions when I first showed up, but both Trevor and Marvin made it clear I was off-limits to discuss. That didn’t stop the curious glances though.
Trevor stopped beside the bag, his workout shorts worn low, a compression sleeve on his one leg, which he said was for stability… even though I felt it was more to cover up the evidence of what happened to bring him home. I took a deep breath and then looked up at him, avoiding his bare chest that had only broadened since I was last home.
“You’re hitting it like it did you wrong.”
I shrugged, not knowing how to answer him. When I told them what happened I gave them the details Marvin would want to know, kept the emotions out of it and anything that would be deemed personal… anything involvinghim.
He studied me for a second longer than normal. “You want to spar?”
I hesitated, he didn’t move or push. He just stood watching me with kind eyes that were both familiar and yet had changed so much.
“Yeah,” I said finally.
The ring ropes creaked as I ducked through them. Marvin had a heavy bag that hung in the garage growing up. At first I would go out, sit and watch quietly as he coached Trevor and then over time Marvin decided I needed to know how to defend myself. So they started including me in training. I remember how heavy those gloves felt when I first put them on, remembering feeling the strain of just trying to keep them up in a protective stance.
Trevor bounced once on the balls of his feet across from me, with a grin. “You are all up in your head, Molly.”
I grunted, shaking out my arms. It almost felt like I had something in my left glove, so I slipped it off for a moment checking my wraps, making sure nothing was in it. Flexing my fingers.
“You gonna talk about him yet?”
My gaze dropped before I could stop it and I saw the way my thumb brushed the empty space where my ring used to sit. Trevor followed the movement, he didn’t miss much. His mouth tightened slightly.
“No,” I said, shoving the glove back on.
He nodded once like he expected that answer and then rolled his neck
We circled each other once. Twice.
Then he said, casually, “Heard something weird this morning.”
I blocked his first swing automatically.
“What kind of weird?” I asked.