With an ease that irritated Sunny to no end, his friend picked up Sunny’s glass of port and sipped from it.“The cheap stuff.The bartender must know that you are too far gone to tell the difference.”He signaled to the tapster.“Get His Grace something to help him sober up.”
The taproom was swimming when Wick all but poured a glass of some noxious liquid down Sunny’s throat.The dark room stopped moving, but his head felt like a horse had sat on it.He’d never felt more miserable in all his life.
“What caused you to scurry away with your tail between your legs, Sunny?”Wick asked in what might have been a normal tone of voice, but it sounded like shouting to Sunny’s intoxicated and aching brain.
“I told Mantheria that I loved her.”
His friend whistled.“Isn’t that a little soon?Her late husband hasn’t been dead a full month yet.”
Sunny dropped his throbbing head into his shaking hands.“I knowthat it is too soon.I didn’t mean to say anything, only the opportunity arose.And I wanted her to know how I felt and what I hoped for.”
“If she said no, then it probably wasn’t the opportunity.”
“Are you trying to help me or not?”
Wick grinned at him.“I’m just enjoying our role reversal.You had so much to say when I was reluctant to court Louisa, and now I am the happily married man with all the good advice.”
“Mantheria doesn’t want to be married again.”
“Once bitten.Twice shy.”
Sunny shook his head.“And she doubts that I can bear strong responsibilities.I am entirely unmanned.”
“You’re entirely foxed,” Wick said, placing a heavy hand on Sunny’s shoulder.“Mantheria takes pride in managing her estates.She knows the names of every man, woman, and child upon them.She keeps abreast of farming inventions and was the person who convinced me to invest in threshing machines and seed drills.Her tenant farms yield almost a quarter more than they did ten years ago.She follows my father’s maxim:The land isn’t yours until you’ve worked it.And you, my friend, like Matthew, have never labored a day in your life.”
Grabbing both sides of his head, Sunny asked, “You think I should become a farming duke?”
“I think you should become a man and take care of your home and estate rather than let others do the heavy lifting,” Wick said.
Exhaling, Sunny slumped his shoulders.“I wouldn’t know where to start.”
“Go home to Sunderland House first thing in the morning and make yourself worthy of my sister.Learn every position on your estate, from the lowest scullery maid to the grooms to the tenant farmers to the duties of your steward.You should know your estate inside and out.And once you do, use that clever, bookish mind of yours to make improvements.”
“What if Mantheria still won’t have me?”
“At least you’ll have your self-respect.”
Wick picked Sunny up by his shoulders and hauled him out of the tavern.It was an ignominious end to an awful day.
19
Mantheria slept until noon the next morning and awoke to hot chocolate and the news that Sunny had already left Avalon Palace, as well as her parents, Becca, and Lord Norwich.They had an engagement ball to prepare for in only three days.
Sipping on her hot chocolate, all Mantheria could think about was Sunny.She didn’t blame him for not waiting to say his farewells to her.She’d been cruel to him yesterday when he’d so sweetly offered her his heart.She set down her cup on the bedside table.Burying her head in her feather-down pillow, Mantheria knew that she’d done the right thing.No matter how miserable she felt.No matter how lonely she would be in the future.Particularly when Andrew went to school and eventually married.
She could not marry again.
Something was wrong with her.
She did not enjoy the marriage bed.
Words that she could never share with Sunny.It was too improper to be considered!No, it was better if he believed the fault was his, for then he would leave her alone, and perhaps they could go back to being easy friends again.If he knew that she loved him, he would want to marry her, and he would even believe that he could be faithful to her.Until he realized, once they were married, that she would not be able to fulfill her marital duties as often as expected, and then he would be disappointed in her.Perhaps he would even still try to stay faithful to her for a while, but eventually, he would tire of her coldness and seek the warm bed and arms of another woman, like Alexander had done.She’d been fond of Alexander when they married, and his unfaithfulness had broken her heart.But Mantheria loved Sunny, and when he would eventually be unfaithful, it would destroy her utterly.
And she’d have no one to blame but herself.Mantheria was a terrible wife.
No.
It was better to be alone.