How’s Utah?
Gino
I miss you
Gino
Is everything ok?
Gino
Please call me
Gino
Did I do something to upset you?
I didn’t know how to respond, so I put my phone down. I needed to keep that life and the life I was living in Utah separate. I was just trying to make it through one day at a time. And, I needed time to figure everything out. Our relationship included.
In the bathroom, I brushed my teeth and washed off my makeup, spending extra time on my mascara that had begun to run. I put on pajama shorts and a tank top, then slipped under the covers. I hoped the alcohol would help me sleep because I didn’t want to embarrass myself by alerting the entire house that I wasn’t as tough as I pretended to be.
I still wondered if it had been wise to go on this trip—so soon after everything that happened, but what was the alternative? Lying in bed? Thinking incessantly about his voice? About his threats? This trip gave me distance from my life. From my parents who constantly gave me those sympathetic looks. From the boutique that I had no idea if I’d ever be able to step foot in again and not relive that experience. I shook off the thoughts, knowing that if I was going to sleep, I needed to clear my mind of all negativity. It was over. It was never going to happen again. I knew that. I just wished I believed it.
The murmur of voices downstairs gave me a sense of comfort, and eventually I drifted off to sleep.
At some point in the middle of the night, I felt myself whimpering.
My bed dipped, and strong arms wrapped around me. I tensed for a beat, then the familiar crisp scent hit my nose, and Thayer whispered, “Go back to sleep. I’m here.”
Instantly, I relaxed, lying completely still in the comfort of his arms. I listened to the soft purr of his breathing and the feel of his heartbeat thrumming against my back. Just for a minute, I pretended this was reality. It would be so easy to be with Thayer. He was present. He cared about me. What you saw was what you got. He had feelings that he wasn’t afraid to express. He was thoughtful and athletic and hot. Thayer was freaking hot, and I don’t even know if he knew how good-looking he was under that tousled hair and scruffy stubble.
I shifted slightly, adjusting my arms and grasping his bare forearms. My hands wrapped around the muscles there. Big mistake. He tightened his hold, and his erection pressed against my ass. Oh boy. I hadn’t felt that before, and it unexpectedly sent tremors coursing through my core. Shit.
The tension was always there…but this closeness. This familiarity. This need. This was uncharted territory for us.
I couldn’t help myself. Even though I knew it was a bad decision—one of the worst I’d ever made—I pushed my ass back, pressing against the hard length of him.
Thayer groaned low in the back of his throat.
I closed my eyes, unbelievably turned on by the sound and by the feel of my brother’s best friend pressed against my body.
“Careful, G,” he warned, low and gravelly. “If you keep doing that, I can’t be held responsible for my actions.”
I had a strong desire to call his bluff. So, I moved my ass again.
“Fuuuuck,” he moaned.
God, I’d never felt more in control. More uninhibited. More desired.
“You don’t want this,” he assured me.
“I’m a big girl, Thayer. Don’t tell me what I want.”
“Yeah, well, you’re drunk and will definitely regret it in the morning,” he said.
“Says who?”
“Says the person doing the right thing for both of us.”