Her eyes widened. “What?”
Letting the alcohol dictate my actions, my lips moved dangerously close to hers and I went for it. But just as my lips narrowly brushed hers, she turned her head and offered up her cheek.
Her fucking cheek.
As if electrocuted by the rejection, I drew back and my embarrassment morphed to anger. “Seriously? My mother dies, and you give me your fucking cheek? Fuck me.” Hoping I’d forget the whole thing in the morning, I did what I’d been doing since I fell for the one girl I could never have. I stepped around her and pretended rejection didn’t hurt like a motherfucker. “Thanks for the ride.”
“Thayer?” she called, her voice cracking.
I wasn’t stupid enough to turn around.
“I’m sorry,” she said as I stepped inside the house and slammed the door behind me.
1
THAYER
ELEVEN MONTHS LATER
I stood in the corner of the bar swigging my beer and watching Kason make his rounds, showing off his much-deserved gold medal to everyone who approached him. I was happy for him. I really was. He worked his ass off—even after his injury—to get back in competing shape. I glanced to the other side of the bar and saw that his girlfriend Shay was watching him. She beamed with pride and displayed complete trust—which definitely wasn’t an easy feat given all the snow bunnies cozying up to her boyfriend for selfies.
I had a feeling word hadn’t made its way inside this Aspen bar that my once-self-absorbed best friend had gone and gotten serious with the least likely girl on the planet. Don’t get me wrong. Shay was perfect for him. Despite her small stature and vast intelligence, she had sass and confidence. And, unlike a lot of the girls who’d come before her, she had goals of her own. And, no gold-medal-flashing pro-snowboarder was gonna get in the way of that.
A group of snowboarders entered the bar, and a roar of applause erupted. Most of them were guys Kason and I had competed against over the last few years from around the world. And, tonight, they’d all finished behind my best friend. You’d never guess it given the eager way they circled the bar, fist-bumping fans before congratulating Kason who literally rubbed the gold medal in their faces. But they laughed it off, knowing they’d have their moments—some of them already boasting gold in other events and competitions.
“You miss it?”
I turned to find Shay beside me. She had a way of appearing out of nowhere, quiet and unnoticed. I wondered if it was because she always tried to blend into the scenery, unlike Kason who endeavored to stand out. “Miss what?” I asked her.
“Snowboarding. Kason said you’re better than him.”
My head hitched back. “He said that?”
She nodded.
I shrugged, unsure what to make of the compliment. Kason never admitted anyone was better than him.
Since I was ten, most of my free time had been spent snowboarding. That all changed once I lost my mom. Snowboarding just didn’t hold the importance it once had. I didn’t want to win competitions if she wasn’t going to be there to cheer me on or to hug me when I reached the bottom of the mountain.
Shay was right. I could snowboard better than Kason. He was reckless, while I was strategic. He was fearless, while I plotted out every move. But he was the one who medaled at the X Games. Not me.
And, despite what anyone may have thought, I was happy for him. I just wished I didn’t feel so empty—and lost.
“Well, I know he’d love to have you by his side if he makes it to the Olympics,” Shay said, still waiting for me to respond but not one to push it.
I scoffed. “Don’t let him hear you say if.”
She chuckled. “Well, think about it.”
“What’s there to think about?”
She stared at me long and hard, her narrowed green eyes reading me. “When you’re going to decide to do what makes you happy.” She turned away from me and headed in the direction of Giselle, who was seated at the bar with our bro Jesse.
Giselle had pretty much been ignoring me since our almost-kiss last year. There’d been a few texts and brief conversations to let me know what was going on with Kason when he was in the hospital, but that was it. It wasn’t like I stuck my tongue down her throat or copped a feel that night. She didn’t let it go there. So, what was her problem? She was the one making it all uncomfortable and weird.
I tore my eyes away from her and pushed my way to the bar unsteadily. Great. Not only was I a washed-up snowboarder at twenty-one, but now I was a drunk. I ordered another beer, swigging it as soon as I had it in my hand. It wasn’t like anything would ever happen with Giselle and me. She was—and always would be—off-limits. And, knowing the number of girls I’d fucked around with—consensually, of course—Kason would kill me if I ever tried. Besides, Giselle had Gino, her rich asshole boyfriend. So, it wasn’t like I was about to condemn myself to a life of celibacy. I was twenty-one and single. I had every right to do whatever the hell I wanted to do.
“Hey, Thayer.” A blonde who looked vaguely familiar stepped up beside me.