Even if it took everything I had.
Careful not to jostle the sleeping vampire beside me, I pushed off the blanket. A horrible odor wafted up, and I wrinkled my nose, gagging.
Good gods. At least now, I knew my first step.
Brush your teeth.
Take a shower.
Clean your hair.
Find something to eat.
Already, I felt a little better. Lists were good. Lists were doable. If I worked on the list, I didn’t need to think about anything else. I could focus on staying alive. Everything else—Julieta, Marius, the mysterious plant, the Tether, and the murderer—would all have to wait.
Tiptoeing my way out of bed, I found a plate of rolls and dried fruit on the small table by the bathing room. Grabbing it as I walked by, I shoved a roll in my mouth while I turned on the shower. Then, I took care of my needs.
When I completed the list—it was woefully short and did not take me long—I stared out the window. The moon was up, and it was snowing. So basically, it was like every single night since I came here.
Changing into a black gown—the color felt appropriate, for once—I braided my damp hair behind my back. Soft snores came from the bed, and I slid the bathing room door open, careful not to wake Sebastian.
Sleep called my name, but I ignored its call. I needed to remain alert. Upright.
Instead, I pulled a shawl around myself and sat in front of the fireplace. A violet orb hung in the center of the hearth, glowing brightly but not giving off any heat. Pulling my knees up against my chest, I stared at the dark stones. They were pristine, clearly having never housed flames.
Why was there a fireplace in a castle full of vampires? In Ithenmyr, I could understand the reasoning. The land was filled with elves of all kinds, werewolves, and humans who lived in… a forced kind of peace. I knew that at one time there used to be dragons who lived there as well, but they were gone. They could have used the hearths. But the vampires hated fire.
The question was a good distraction. I stared into the empty hearth, wishing for a crackling fire. In Ipotha, I never appreciated the beauty of yellow and orange flames flickering over logs, or the way wood spit and crackled as it released heat. Only now, as a frigid breeze came through the cracks in the stone and I sat on the cold floor, did I remember that I used to love sitting in front of fires on late winter nights.
Now I lived in the land of eternal winters, and yet, I had no fire. No flames. All because of them. The vampires. They were the reason for everything bad in my life. I was here because of them. Julieta died at their hands.
And I…
I was Tethered to one of them. My life was Bound to Sebastian’s. If we didn’t break this curse, I wasn’t sure what would become of me. Would I live my life out in this castle, constantly at Sebastian’s whim? Being pulled along through the shadows like his little assistant who couldn’t even defend herself?
Maybe it wouldn’t come to that.
Something Sebastian said the day Julieta died struck me. He needed me. He was… hungry. What happened to vampires if they didn’t eat? Could he die? If that came to pass, what would happen to me?
I was so lost in my thoughts; I didn’t hear Sebastian’s approach. His hand landed on my shoulder, and I squealed.
“Luna.” He crouched beside me, and I shifted, turning to face him.
The vampire’s black eyes were wide, and his wings were fanned out behind him as he eyed me as one would an injured animal. “What are you doing?”
The back of his wing brushed my shoulder, but other than that, he didn’t touch me.
I stared at the empty hearth. “I’m just… thinking.”
“What about?”
Sighing, I ran a hand down my damp braid. “What is the meaning of all this, Sebastian? Why did Julieta die and not me? Why did Ciro Tether us? None of it makes any sense. Even our marriage. Why now? What is happening in the Four Kingdoms that has your mother so spooked?”
“That’s a lot of thoughts,” he said after a moment.
“And I don’t have any answers.”
Sebastian tilted his head, his dark eyes studying me carefully before he dropped to the ground with a sigh. His long legs stretched out beside me, and his wings flared out behind us both. He leaned back on both hands, staring into the purple lights.