He nodded, his mouth pressed in a firm line, and I pressed his hand against my chest.
“Sebastian, if she made you, it’s not your fau—”
“Those souls are on my conscience,” he said, shaking his head.
My brows furrowed. “But that doesn’t mean—”
“The deaths I have caused are my weight to bear. Luna, I have done terrible things. Unfathomable things.” He sucked in a deep breath, running a hand through his hair as his wings flexed behind them. “Those lives…they weren’t mine to take.”
“What do you mean?” I paused, choosing my words carefully. “Were they innocent?”
I wasn’t sure what I would do if that were the case.
“Gods, no,” he said vehemently, shaking his head. “They all deserved what they got. I’ve never killed an innocent.”
Thank Kydona.
Before I could speak, Sebastian sighed. The sound was heavy and filled with such vast amounts of pain that my heart ached. “The thing is Luna, their crimes were never against me. None of them harmed me, at least not directly.”
His words hung in the air between us, and my eyes searched his. Swirling storms of hurt looked back at me, and I wanted nothing more than to wrap my arms around him.
“But these people… they were evil.”
“They were,” he agreed. “And I would do it again if I had to.”
What did it say about me that I wasn’t scared by this admission? He was a killer, but I knew he would never hurt me.
Sebastian’s voice deepened as he raised a hand, cupping my cheek. “Those people who were down there? The People of the Night? They tried to hurtyou.” His voice hardened, and he cupped the back of my neck. Shadows curled around him as he spoke. “What I said earlier was true. I love you, Luna. More than anyone else in my entire life.”
He reached out, taking hold of my wrist. His fingers ran over the Binding Mark, his gentle touch at odds with the fierceness of his tone.
“Make no mistake, darling, you are mine. My wife. My princess. Your enemies are my enemies. Your problems are now my problems. I will destroy anyone who threatens you. I will tear them limb from limb, painting the snow with the blood that runs through their veins before presenting you with the stakes used to pierce their blackened hearts.”
His words should probably have instilled a healthy sense of fear in me. I probably should have been repulsed. Instead, a twisted part of me warmed at this macabre, amorous declaration.
There was definitely something wrong with me.
I drew in a deep breath. “Sebastian—”
“No, Luna. Don’t you see? I would doanythingfor you, and now there is an uncontained threat. The People of the Night are not to be trifled with.” He moved away from me, balling his fists at his side. “This was my chance—maybe my only one—to stop them before they try again to hurt you. Before your unexpected arrival, I finally got some good information. These people areeviland they are trying to hurt you. I could have dealt with them, but now we are right back at the beginning.”
The weight of his words slammed into me.
I ruined everything.
Tears pricked at my eyes, and I brushed them away. “Sebastian, I’m sorry. I should have stayed put. I was just…”
“Worried. I know.” Sighing, he shook his head and slumped by the door. His wings slipped into the shadows and he hung his head. “Just… go to sleep, Luna. I’ll keep watch. There’s no point shadowing back to the castle now. We’ll wait till the sun sets and then I’ll take us home. We can talk more about this then.”
His face made it clear he was done talking. I prepared for bed in silence, pulling the covers over myself as I thought about where this all went wrong.
Bloody nightmares haunted me as I slept.