“Xander?”
He sucked his lip through his teeth, rubbing the back of his neck, before sitting up straight. Xander reached into the collar of his tunic and pulled out a piece of string tied around his neck, revealing a small tube attached to one end.
Holding my breath, I watched as Xander carefully withdrew two pieces of worn brown leather from the tube and laid them before me. Each was about the size of my hand, worn with time and filled with long, black markings. They were written in a language I didn’t understand, but it was clearly a map of… something.
My brows furrowed as I ran a finger down the markings etched on the leather. Chewing on my bottom lip, I turned to Xander.
His jaw was clenched, his eyes hooded as he, too, ran a finger over the pieces of the map.
Eventually, I found my voice. “The story… you… you’re Elyx?”
Xander nodded, his eyes distant. His voice was softer than before as he said, “When I was born, they named me Elyxander, but since that day…” He shook his head. “I go by Xander now.”
“I’m sorry,” I said. Grabbing his hand once more, I waited until his eyes were locked onto mine. I hoped he could see the sincerity of my words. “Xander, I am so sorry. About your village, your mother, your friends… no one deserves to go through that.”
After that, words seemed to escape us both. We remained there, our hands intertwined until the fire burned low.
I glanced outside and saw that the sun was high in the sky. Hours had passed since we’d first come in from the river.
Xander’s thumb was rubbing circles on my hand as he stared off into the distance. I wasn’t even sure he knew was doing it. I wasn’t sure why I waslettinghim do it.
All I knew was that things were more complicated now than ever before. I didn’t hate him. I realized that now. Hate was strong. Too strong for what I felt about this male.
I wasn’t sure that I liked him. I knew he provoked strong feelings within me. He seemed to go out of his way to push me. Xander definitely was notkindto me. But I didn’t hate him.
And maybe he didn’t hate me either? I wasn’t certain. All I knew was he needed someone right now, and I was the only one there.
A long time had passed when another question struck me.
“Xander,” I started hesitantly, “your sister… Is she here?”
It was as though I had dumped a bucket of cold water on his head. He dropped my hand, pushing himself to his feet.
“She’s gone,” he replied gruffly.
His eyes hardened as he reached down and took the two pieces of the map. Xander carefully rolled them together before he slipped them back into the tube. I watched silently as he picked up my dress. I had forgotten all about it.
“Saena isgone,” he repeated. The second time, it was as though he was telling himself, not me.
An air of deep sadness came over him. His shoulders were slumped, and his back stooped as he stood before me, holding out my dress.
“Oh, Xander.” I took the dress in my hands. It was mostly dry, with just a hint of dampness remaining. “I am so, so, sorry.”
And I was. This male, who had been a stranger to me a week ago, was many things. But no one deserved to be left alone. Suddenly, so much about Xander made sense. No one could suffer as much loss as he did and not be affected. I asked, “Is Nonna your real grandmother?”
“No. She found me wandering in the woods a few months after Saena…” His voice cracked and he shook his head. “I was broken, and Nonna took me in.” He rubbed his hands over his face, shoving his long hair back and tying it with a piece of leather.
When he was done, he looked at me. His face was hard, his hands clenched at his sides as he grabbed his dagger and sheathed it on his thigh. “I don’t want to talk about this anymore. Get dressed. I’m going to go check the snares I set last night around the cavern while you were sleeping. I’ll be back before nightfall. Keep your daggers by your side, just in case.”
Just in case.
Those three words were a stark reminder of the danger we found ourselves in. The Red Shadow. The Winged Soldiers.
“Xander, I—”
He shook his head. “I can’t do this right now, Aileana.”
Before I could say another word, he stormed out of the cavern. I was left alone, reeling in the wake of the sudden shift in his moods. I got dressed and plaited my hair, all the while repeating Xander’s story to myself.