He blinked at me. “What?”
“Kiss me,” I whispered. The words were barely audible over the pounding of my heart. I repeated, a little louder this time, “If you want to, kiss me.”
He groaned. No sooner was the last word out of my mouth than his lips were on mine. There was nothing gentle about this kiss.
This kiss was everything. It was life-changing. To call it merely a kiss would be a disservice to what it was. It wasn’t just a kiss. It was a claiming. A declaration. A saying of things unsaid between us.
It was a proclamation of things to come.
As we came together, I felt something within me shift. The piece of myself that had been unlocked earlier when the Winged Soldiers attacked finally clicked into place. This wasright.
Xander’s lips were warm as they moved against me, pushing me. He grabbed the back of my neck, tilting my head so I was positioned just how he liked it. It was as though he had thought about this moment before.
Maybe he’d missed me as much as I had missed him.
A growl rumbled through his chest as he ran his hand down my front. He touched me over my dress, leaving a trail of sparks in his path. I pressed myself against him, seeking relief for something I couldn’t identify. My insides twisted as the now-familiar heat began low in my stomach.
I wanted more. I needed more. Him. I needed him. In whatever way I could get.
“Xander,” I whispered. The word was more than a name. It was a plea. A prayer.
The moment my lips parted, a tiny gasp escaped me. He chuckled darkly as his tongue swept into my mouth. My entire world tilted on its axis as heclaimedme. There was nothing gentle about the male in front of me.
He tasted of smoke and spice and the earth. Everywhere he touched me felt like it was on fire, but it still wasn’t enough.
A whimper escaped me as I ground myself against him, seeking relief from the foreign feelings taking residence within me. I moaned, my nerves feeling as though they were on fire when he pulled back.
He took a step back, putting space between us, and I stared at him. I felt cold. So cold. I yearned for the feeling of his body against mine once more.
Taking a step towards him, I tilted my head, a question in my eyes.
Xander held up his hands, shaking his head as he stumbled back a step, then two. He was panting, his eyes wide as he ran his fingers through his hair.
“Dammit,” he said gruffly, “That was… I didn’t mean to… I can’t do this.”
He shook his head, his mouth pinched as he breathed raggedly. My heart squeezed tightly as I realized what was happening.
He regretted it. This. Whatever this was. He regrettedme.
Just like that, it was as though someone had poured a bucket of cold water on the fire Xander had lit between us.
“Don’t worry about it,” I snapped. Crossing my arms in front of my chest as though they could protect me from this male and thefeelingshe stirred within me, I continued. My voice was as hard as steel as I said, “I know how you feel about me. Nothing has changed.”
Lies.
All lies. Everything had changed. Nothing would ever be the same again. How could I hate someone who made me feel this way? I didn’t hate Xander. Not even close.
But obviously, he didn’t feel the same way. Because he regretted this. I wasn’t enough for him.
A long moment passed as we just…. stared at each other. Xander’s jaw was clenched, his eyes dark as he took a step toward me. “Aileana,” he started, “it’s not…”
I shook my head, holding up a hand to stop him from talking. “Forget about it. I don’t want to hear it. Will you just walk me to the dining hall?”
Xander blew out a long breath before nodding. “Okay. I will.”
He offered me his elbow, the picture of a perfect gentleman, and I took it.
We walked in silence. He didn’t talk, and I didn’t want him to. I wasn’t going to let him hurt me any more than he already had.