I cringed as the black dog thing—the mount for the Jugglers—yelped and was thrown to its back. The foxes bounced all around the boss. I had missed what had happened to the one who’d been grabbed.
The boss wasn’t really fighting back so much as trying to grab the remaining ninjas to pull them into his pouch.
If we didn’t hurry this up, one of these teams was going to get zeroed out.
The bugbears had fled to their van. The two weird Jugglers started casually moving down the hill toward the monster. The two were holding hands and skipping.
Chiyome tossed something at the kangaroo, and fire flamed from the pouch. The boss cried out in pain, and the boss’s health bar went down a significant amount. He reached into his own pouch and pulled out a flaming screaming creature.
It was the missing razor fox.
The kangaroo reached up and ate the poor fox, and the boss’s health rocketed all the way up to the top. The two remaining foxes scattered back. The bear and the dog also retreated.
My fellow racers groaned.
“We’re pickled,” Genesis said.
Chiyome: I fear our efforts are futile. This monster heals quickly. Its only weak spot is inside its pouch.
Hmm.
Carl: Donut, can you zoom in on any of those dead joeys and examine them properly?
Donut: IT SAYS THEY DIED OF STARVATION.
Carl: Can you see their inventory?
Donut: IT’S JUST THEIR SKIN. WEIRD. I HAVEN’T SEEN THAT IN A WHILE.
And there it is. There will always be clues.
[ 21 ]
Chiyome:We are implementing your plan. We will avenge Ito’s death!
“Carl, how are they going to get a skin? I thought NPCs couldn’t get into other people’s inventory.” We crept down the hill toward the giant kangaroo, who remained sitting there in the road, hollering at the other boss.
I almost slipped and fell on my ass after stepping on some loose hail. The ground shook.
The hailstones were getting bigger.
“Mobs can’t loot inventory, but NPCs can in certain circumstances. That’s what Mordecai says, and nobody seemed to question it when I suggested it. Remember, Dong keeps his lance in his inventory.”
Nico remained at the top of the hill with his pig. He was currently in a shouting match with his other partner, who didn’t want him to bring Penelope to the boss fight.
Because Pontiff had come with us, Nico and Penelope were no longer protected from the elements, and both were getting soaked. The pig squealed miserably every time she was hit with a chunk of hail, and I was starting to genuinely worry they were going to get killed by the elements.
The last thing we needed right now was a pissed-off god randomly showing up.
“Yeah, so,” Rapture said to me, “I’m thinking maybe we can do an alliance thing. You know, instead of us killing you next race? I know you’re loser bitchmeat weaklings, but we’ll allow you to work with us. Maybe we should get those foxes. I didn’t like the way their bear was looking at our car just as the race was about to start.”
We were interrupted before I could answer.
“Babies,” Prison Pocket the demon kangaroo said, spying us. “Come here, little babies. Let me put you in my warm, safe pouch.” He had a comical, almost offensively fake Australian accent. Like the sort of thing that would cause you to get your ass kicked by real Australians if they heard you talking like that. “Babies, let’s get you out of this rain.”
“He talks?” Donut asked, incredulous.
From the kangaroo’s pouch, the engineer guy popped his head up. He was an older human, and he wore the skin of a dead joey like it was a Halloween costume. His entire face was red and burned. He croaked for help, reaching out toward us. Multiple other dead kangaroo joeys dangled from the top of the pouch, like socks draped over a clothesline.