Page 25 of Scars So Lovely

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This doesn’t feel real. Like I just stepped sideways into a different version of my life.

Me:

Thank you. But one-way?

Pause.

Soren:

Yeah, not being weird. It’s just usually cheaper to book last-minute out of Ravelle. Something about flight path routing.

I breathe a sigh of relief. It’s his city. I’m sure he knows what he’s talking about.

Me:

I guess I’m coming to Ravelle.

I’ll have to do some work while I’m there. I hope that’s okay.

The reply comes instantly.

Soren:

Good.

No problem at all re work.

I’ve got you now.

I read it twice. Something tightens in my chest. Not fear or anxiety, but something heavier.

I’ve got you now.

I should push back. Say I’m not something to begot. That I’m not looking for a savior.

That I gotmyselfout.

That I always do.

But I’m tired.Sotired. And right now, it feels like relief.

I close my eyes. Picture the airport. The plane. The moment the door shuts and I’m not here anymore.

For the first time in months, I feel something like hope.

I open my eyes. Look around the room. At the space I never fully unpacked in, because I never believed I’d stay.

My throat tightens.

“Watch me,” I whisper.

Because this time I’m not asking.

Not waiting.

Not shrinking.

I’m leaving.