And I’ll do whatever it takes to keep that spark alive, even if it means dismantling Timmy’s entire world from the shadows.
CHAPTER 57
BOILING POINT
MARGAUX
It’s well into October, but because it’s Sunset Cay, the weather hasn’t really changed. Humidity still clings to me the moment I walk outside, pressing down on me like a gravity blanket. The sun sets a little earlier, but other than that the atmosphere is peak tropical vibes.
We head to downtown Sunset Cay for the annual Pride Parade. I’m excited, having gone to many parades when I lived back in DC. I even book a hotel so we can be responsible, enjoy ourselves, and not have to drive an hour back in the dark.
On the way there, I find a Pride playlist and blast it through the truck’s speakers. I’m thrilled, because it’s finally an event to look forward to, an occasion to feel positive about, an opportunity to be an ally and justenjoysomething without all the drama or stress.
A friend of mine happens to be visiting from California for work, and we spend time with her and her friend, laughing and chatting and reminiscing about the old DC days. It’s a moment of lightness, another eye in the unending storm.
But, while I’m excited to celebrate and have a good time, my mindset in general is miserable. I’m apprehensive, and can’t help but think of our prior night out in Downtown, when Timmy threw an unprovoked tantrum and I ended up snoozing in the plants at a fancy hotel.
Later, the Pride event is fun, but the vibrant colors remind me of what’s become my dull existence.
People’s general frivolity reminds me of the darkness that’s consuming me day by day.
Timmy’s carefree exuberance serves as a stark reminder of how he usually treats me now.
So I drink way more than I should, because that’s just what I do sometimes to cope. Not a healthy strategy, I know. But what are the other options, really? In my current headspace, there are none.
I get way too drunk, and stumble my way back to the hotel. At one point, I make friends with a comfortable-looking set of stairs, and Timmy has to get somebody to help me to get in an Uber.
But Timmy is drunk, too.
When we get back to our room, he’s in a playful mood, and he’s doing something in the hotel’s mini-kitchen. I’m not sure what.
He brought snacks and supplies for making ramen with us, and after a few minutes I can smell the distinct umami aroma of one of his delicious broths.
I lie on my stomach on the bed, feet up in the air, scrolling through my phone while he putters about in the other room.
Suddenly, I feel his presence right behind me. “Ssss! You’re hot!” he announces, and a scalding pain sears across my ass and my leg.
“What the fuck?!” I scream, leaping off the bed and running to the bathroom, tears springing to my eyes as the pain blossoms across my skin.
I turn the shower to cold and step under the stream, desperate to cool the burning sensation.
In the background, I hear him laughing.Laughing.
He finds it funny.
The man who just pouredboiling ramen wateron me is doubled over in laughter.
“Why did you do that?” I look out from the bathroom, my voice shaking with pain and disbelief. “That’s insane!”
His laughter stops abruptly as his eyes narrow at the mention of the ‘I’ word, replaced by a chilling growl. “You’re not supposed to live,” he says, his words like ice water down my spine.
I’m too stunned to respond. I retreat to the bed, curling up with my knees to my chest, trembling.
He glares at me, his eyes devoid of remorse, before storming out of the room. The door slams behind him.
I grab my phone, my hands shaking as I type a message to Alice:
Me: