"Why?"
"Because you would probably want to run from me now."
Run? No, most definitely not.
I closed the distance between us, wrapping my arms around his waist instead and looked up at him.
"Tell me," I murmured. "Do you have a Mafia therapist? Because I might need one if I am to stay with you."
15
NICOLAS
The last timeI felt this scared was when they took my father into the OR while I stood there with his blood on my hands. The warehouse where Aria operated was half an hour away from my house, but as we drove back it felt like an eternity had passed, and the entire time I couldn't stop thinking about Ajla.
Her smile.
Her voice.
The way she commanded me and the way she let me take charge.
The way I felt when she was in my arms and how I have never slept as well as I did with her in my arms.
I could see our future together this morning, and it had l almost been ripped away from mewhen I heard that the house was under attack. I should've known she would've been able to defend herself, although I had no idea where she stood now that she had seen me killing a man. A bad man, but still.
Even those of us who were born into this life weren't so cold-hearted when another life was taken, no matter how much that person had wronged us. And I was a killer. I was a monster, the devil of Redmont City, and as she sat next to me in a different room from mine where Johnny's body still lay, I wondered if I had screwed everything up.
"Are you okay?" I asked, trying to break the silence that had enveloped us as soon as I took her out of there.
My guys were already cleaning up the house, and thanks to Aria and her crew, we were able to help. What surprised me the most when I walked inside was seeing Don Mancini's vacant eyes staring at me as he lay dead at the bottom of the staircase.
I guess that this wasn't the outcome he was hoping for, but I was glad I didn't have to be the one to kill him. I wouldn't be surprised if it was one of his own who had killed him.
The men we had found here dropped their weapons rather quickly, and those that hadn’t been cooperated were dealt with rather quickly. Now Ijust hoped this wouldn't be the last time I'd be seeing Ajla, and if she decided she wanted nothing to do with me, I honestly had no idea what I would do.
I couldn't deny this soul-deep connection I felt with her, no matter how crazy it was. We didn't know each other, not really, but having her with me felt as if the pieces of the puzzle were finally falling into place, and I didn't want to live my life thinking of what could have been.
"When I was maybe seven or eight years old, one of my cousins killed himself by detonating a hand grenade in front of our primary school," she suddenly said, staring at her hands. "I wasn't close to him, but I was close enough to see the pieces of him scattered all over the monument that was built in front of the school. So did the other kids."
Jesus. "I'm so sorry, darling."
"I know." She turned toward me, her eyes bright, nowhere near as panicky as I expected them to be. "I grew up in a country where violence eradicated families. Where greed played the biggest part and where they tried to divide us based on religion, nationality, and who our ancestors were. To this day they still call it a Civil War, but in reality it was a war created by those who wanted more money, more power, and they played us all like puppets,pulling people into battles they wanted no part of." She clasped my hand and scooted closer to me. "The reason I'm telling you this is because I vowed to myself that violence would never be an answer. I always thought I could solve everything without using unnecessary force, but now I can see I was wrong. Hearing Johnny talk about you, about me, as if we were just pawns reminded me of the politicians back home who still see my people as puppets and nothing more, and I knew those types of men would never listen to reason."
I had no idea where she was going with this, but I didn't want to stop her. She wasn't running away, so that was a start.
A massive start.
She wasn't screaming or crying and I just hoped this wasn't some kind of delayed reaction.
"I understand that your world requires violence, because some of these men don't understand rational words," she continued. "I understand you would always protect your people, and I actually don't mind that. And for whatever reason, I feel like there's more to us, Nico. I feel like you're the answer to a lot of my prayers, and while I don't know what the future holds for us, I don't want to run from you. I don't want to hide. I don't want to spend the rest of my life feeling like I'm missing a crucial partof my soul, because that's what you feel like—like you're crucial for my soul. And yeah, I see you looking at me, waiting for me to tell you to take me home and that I don't want to see you ever again, but tough luck buttercup—you're kinda stuck with me."
I couldn't wait any longer. I couldn't bear the distance between us, and before she could say anything else, I kissed her. No, I devoured her, showing her how much those words meant to me. My tongue ran over her teeth, seeking entrance, and as if we had done this a million times before, she opened up, letting me in.
Letting me lead and letting me hold her as our kiss slowed down.
"But I wasn't joking," she pulled slightly back and looked up at me. "I might really need a therapist."
"I'll get you one," I laughed. "I'll get you three if it means you would stay with me."