I stood there in silence, waiting for the residual energy to clear the room. When the coast was clear, Kaden turned back to face me and placed his hands on my shoulders, applying a firm and grounding pressure. “Where’s your head?” he checked in.
“I’m good, focused,” I responded quietly.
He nodded and reassured me, “Good. Don’t worry about him, I’ve got it covered. We will give the crowd a better show than they paid for.”
Taking a deep and steady breath, I was startled by the door flying open once more, but this time the energy was completely different. It was a whirlwind of noisy cheerfulness.
Summer appeared, shouting, “Surprise!” as she ran toward me, her arms opened wide. “You didn’t think I would miss this, did you?” She rushed over and embraced me with the biggesthug. “Now, you get out of here and I’ll take it from here.” She smiled at Kaden who kissed me on the forehead and left me to be at the hands of my best friend.
Thirty Five
Val
The air in the tunnel was dense, a thick soup of dust and anxiety, seasoned with the cheers of the audience. I stood there, wrapped in my hoodie, every muscle in my body coiled tight, ready to spring. I could hear Mia Amore’s walkout music begin. It was aggressive and slightly intimidating, but not as intimidating as the loud reception from her fans. A familiar, icy knot of dread tightened in my stomach, and I was quickly becoming the ghost of the small girl who lost to her previously.
This time, I wasn’t alone with my fear. Kaden was there, standing beside me, his presence a shield of calm. His hand was resting on my arm, not holding me, but instead attempting to ground me. I reached up and grasped my collar in my fingertips, knowing I was going to have to remove it before entering the octagon.
Kaden looked over at me and leaned in to whisper in my ear. “Do you hear the noise?” His voice was a low rumble. “Don’t think of it as chaos, my love. Turn it into the background static and only focus on my voice as I am directing you out there.”
I took a deep breath, inhaling the familiar scent of his cologne. “Yes, sir.”
Suddenly, the lights cut out and the announcer's voice boomed, calling out my name. The crowd began to surge and I had no idea I had so many complete strangers there to cheer me on. My intro music began, a stark difference compared to Mia’s, but Mature by Hilary Duff felt more appropriate today. The confident beat hit me with a rush of adrenaline mixed with memories of where I had come from to where I am now.
Sometimes you don’t realize how much you’ve truly healed.
I started my walk, keeping my eyes fixed forward. The music was the rhythm of my healing and I couldn’t help but think about the shame and vulnerability stolen from me in the past. Instinctively, I touched my collar once more. It was the antithesis of everything I had left. I wasn’t walking out here as a product of my past, but as the architect of my future. My power wasn’t gone. It was invested in Kaden’s promise of protection, and tonight he was protecting me in ways I had never imagined possible.
Finally, I stepped into the blinding spotlights and was met by one of the refs, who did the pre-screen before entering the octagon. He checked my gloves and made sure I had my mouth guard. Then he applied Vaseline to the vulnerable points of my face, prone to splitting upon impact.
Kaden appeared behind me and removed my collar for me, tucking it away safely in his pocket and assuring me he would put it back on as soon as he could. I didn’t expect to feel so naked without it hugging my neck.
Kaden grasped me by the sides of my head and commanded my focus. “You’ve got this. Remember, everything we’ve practiced, and don’t forget to listen tomyvoice. They are treating this similar to a main event so you’re going to get five rounds instead of the usual three. Don’t rush. Just stay focused.”
I nodded. His words echoed in my mind, before we parted and I entered the octagon. My eyes immediately met Mia’s. Last time, I was presented with areas in which I hadn’t been trained on, this time I was more than ready for whatever came my way.Or so I hoped.
The ref went over the rules and expectations of our match and invited us to touch gloves before we started. As I stood there waiting for the bell to ring, the sound of the crowd disappeared, and it was just her and I on the mat. I steadied my breathing and reminded myself,slow and steady, Val.
Ding. Ding. Ding. The bell finally rang.
I didn’t rush in. Instead, I circled low, disciplined, using my footwork to deny Mia her range. I was calm. I could tell Mia was taken aback. She had clearly expected the timid girl from our first fight, but today I was forcing her to play chess when she clearly wanted checkers. Eventually, she threw her first predictable combination. I didn’t react. Instead, I executed slipping through, dropping and driving through her hips.
The feeling of driving her down to the mat and landing on top, in control, was an immediate stunning victory for me. I couldn’t believe I had initiated the grappling. I was the one in control. I used my body weight, pressing down, and exhausting her beneath me. I spent the last minute of the round forcing her to fight against my position, sneaking in hits to her side and face when deemed appropriate.
It felt like the round had just begun when suddenly the bell rang again. I sat on the stool and drank some water as Kaden hyped me up and told me what to look for, as well as what I was doing perfectly. “Just watch out and make sure you’re not exhausting yourself, otherwise, things will turn quickly.”
I took his advice into serious consideration as he touched my forehead with his. “You’ve got this.”
The second and third rounds were simply repetitions of this strategy. I landed key punches, forced her into inferior positions, and if she was standing, I clinched and tired her out. My energy was holding and my focus was absolute. Kaden assured me I was up three rounds, which was exactly where he wanted me, but we wouldn’t know for sure until the end when they announced the winner.
There was a brief moment before the fourth round dissolved into a haze of water, cool air, and Kaden’s intense gaze. “She’s going to come for the knockout. Stay tight.”
I had no idea how he knew this but I trusted his judgment.Stay tight –our constant mantra.
The fourth round exhibited a desperate surge from Mia. She was fast, furious, and swinging with bad intentions. I managed to dodge her strikes until she cornered me against the cage. Then, in a wild scramble, her arm wrapped around the back of my neck and she held me in a rear-naked choke.
The pressure was instantaneous and crushing. The lack of air sent me into a physical reminder of helplessness. My hands flew up, not to defend but to claw wildly at the pressure. I was panicking. The old, primal panic of an unwanted loss of control surged up from my gut. I felt trapped. I couldn’t breathe. It was happening again.
My vision began to narrow and the noise of the crowd was fading. She was going to win. Again. I had already given up.