Kaden waited a few seconds, letting the heat bloom across my ass. the next strike landed in a different spot, slightly lower from where the first strike hit. It was louder. My body tightened and suddenly I was bubbling over with excitement. Adrenaline that would have previously triggered a flight response, had now been converted into a state of euphoria.
Soon, he fell into a rhythm matching the beat of the music humming in the background. The stinging sensations werepiling up in a layer of heat. He would occasionally rub his hand over the areas which would add a deeper level of excitement.
When he stopped, I craved for him to keep going.Hmph.I began to pout.
“Where are you, my love?” he inquired.
I swallowed hard. “Is that all you’ve got?” The words slipped between my lips with ease and I realized we had attracted a crowd as they giggled and waited to see how he handled me.
He gave me a look, making me excited about what was about to happen. He picked up a cane which was designed for a sharper strike. The sound of the cane cutting through the air was mesmerizing.
That’s when it happened.
The connection was chosen, defined, and delivered by a man I trusted with my very being. Knowing that made the pain begin to feel more like a purge of emotions. Each strike felt like it was chasing the negative feelings straight out of my body.
When I had been abused, the pain was random, undeserved, and came with powerlessness.
Now, I was the one in control, even if I was positioned in a completely vulnerable state. The man who had all of the power over me was checking in periodically and making sure I was safe.What an empowering moment.
“She’s mesmerizing.” I heard an exchange of comments between a couple who had been watching us.
No sooner than we had started, Kaden was suddenly delivering one final strike. The feelings from our session were cathartic and I didn’t want it to end. I heard the sound of the implement dropping to the floor and I came to when he placed his warm hands on my lower back, grounding me with his presence.
“Val, are you okay? Tell me where you-”
I cut him off. “Kaden,” I whispered. “Green, I promise, green.”
He didn’t speak. Instead, he enveloped me with his entire body, communicating an understanding that transcended words. I had finally found my safe space. Our dynamic was the beginning of my true healing. It was nothing I could have ever imagined.
???
Standing up, I was a bit unsteady on my feet. My skin was on fire with a delicious and purposeful burn, but for the first time in a long time; my mind was clearer than it had ever been.
“Breathe, my love,” Kaden murmured, his voice now reverted to a more nurturing cadence. “Good girl.”
Kaden helped me, moving with an almost heartbreaking gentleness. My body felt heavy and raw. He didn’t make me walk far, just to a private room dimly lit with soft plush seating. The room was set up specifically for decompression. The air here was softer and less charged. I hadn’t realized how welcoming it was until I sat down.
The first thing Kaden handed me was a dark, beyond-soft blanket he had pulled from his bag. He wrapped it around me and tucked it in tight. The sensation had my skin buzzing and reminded me we were safely isolated within the walls of our covenant.
Next, he handed me a bottle of water he pulled from the mini fridge sitting in the corner of the room. He pulled it back as I went to grasp it and twisted off the lid before handing it to me. I smiled, wiggling my way out of the blanket so I could take it from him and chugged it down. Then, came a square of insanely dark chocolate. I tilted my head in confusion.
“You used up a lot of adrenaline. This will help.” He smiled.
I was giddy at the surprise chocolate he handed me. I let it melt slowly on my tongue. The richness was a perfect counterpoint to the sensation lingering on my skin. Kaden’s attention to detail, providing me with things I needed at this point spoke volumes. He pulled out a hairbrush and began to brush through my hair and I melted into the sofa. All of this was proof his power was tethered to his responsibility. Kaden wasn’t just commanding but also nurturing.
Soon I found him nestling in beside me, leaving only a sliver of space between us. He pulled me into his lap as he embraced me and my face rested into the familiar scent of his neck. “Where is your head at, Val?” he inquired.
I pressed my lips together as I debated on what words to use. “Relieved.”
His eyes widened. “Relieved of what?”
I leaned back just far enough to look into his eyes and smiled. “The shame, the fear, every moment of torment. It’s all over.” I traced the collar resting against my throat. “Tonight, every strike was earned, this pain overtook past pain. Most importantly, you respected me. I’ve never felt safer and I feel like this was just the beginning of my trauma losing its voice.”
A fresh wave of tears began to purge all of my emotions.
Kaden’s expression softened, and he tilted my chin up, his thumb stroking my jaw. “Together we’re taking back those moments of stolen power and making them ours.” He pulled me in and kissed me softly at first, but the emotions between us began to intensify as his erection throbbed beneath me. Suddenly, I wanted nothing more than to take care of him, show him how much I appreciated the work he’d put in to help me.
Twenty Nine