We took Thor out to the dog run, which I was happy to see was well-lit and enclosed by the building. There were a lot of people around, and Jenna seemed friendly with everyone. She greeted all the dogs by name, and some of the people too. I wasn’t at all surprised that everyone knew and liked her.
Then we brought Thor home, and a few minutes later, we were in my car, heading to Market Square.
“I’m sorry about Thor. He’s really a good boy.”
“I know he is. Don’t worry about it. What kind of dog is he?”
“No idea, he’s a mutt from a shelter.”
“That’s awesome. I had a mutt growing up. I’d love to have a dog, but I can’t with the hours I work.”
“I wish I’d had a dog growing up.” Sadness crept into her voice before she smiled again. “I love having Thor.”
It was both impressive and concerning how easily she pushed her feelings aside as she launched into another funny story about him being scared, but I couldn’t help wondering what lay behind those moments of sadness and fear. I wanted to be sure her happiness was genuine. I wanted her to open up, to trust me with both her worries and her joy.
“Oh my! What an incredible place!” Jenna’s eyes glowed as she looked around Market Square, taking in all the colors of the lights and flags hanging across the streets and the eclectic Mexican restaurants and vendors.
“You’ve never been here?”
“Once, but it was a huge fiesta. I didn’t stay long or have any desire to come back. But on a quiet night like this, I love it.”
“Me too. It’s like we stepped into another world.”
Jenna admired the handcrafted goods as we meandered down the street toward the restaurant. She offered praise to the vendors, greeting them in English or Spanish, matching whichever language they greeted her in, sweet and thoughtful as always. Except…fuck.
Motherfucker. I grabbed Jenna’s hand and dragged her away from an asshole aggressively trying to sell her a necklace.
“Liam! What’s wrong?”
“You flinched away from him. From all of them. You smiled and thanked them, but you were scared.”
Jenna’s eyes softened. “It’s okay. I like looking at everything, and everyone has been friendly. No one did anything wrong. It’s not their fault I get nervous easily. They don’t deserve rudeness because of things that have nothing to do with them.” She said it matter-of-factly, like it was normal.
“Jenna,” I whispered, the pain in my chest stealing my words. I don’t think she meant to reveal everything that sentenceconveyed. I don’t think she even realized how much I pulled out of it. “You don’t have to talk to them or do anything you aren’t comfortable doing. You don’t owe anybody anything.”
“It’s for me, not for them. I’m having a great time. I’m used to feeling a little…afraid…all the time. I’ve accepted it. I’m not going to miss out on this or anything else because of that fear.”
I was proud of her for that attitude. It showed an incredible amount of self-awareness and strength. But it was hard to focus on that, on anything at all, above the overwhelming need to drive my fist through the motherfucker who’d made her afraid all the fucking time. All. The. Fucking. Time.
“I’m okay. Really. Please, don’t let this ruin our night.”
I forced a smile and nodded. “I won’t. But I’m going to hold your hand, okay? If you need anything, squeeze my hand, and I’ll be more than happy to throw down for you.”
“Thanks,” Jenna drawled, raising her brows like she was questioning my sanity, and I couldn’t blame her. But then in an unguarded moment, appreciation flashed across her face, making me even more insane with the burning need to protect her.
We walked quietly, hand in hand, for a few minutes before Jenna pointed to a booth. “I’d like to look at those scarves. But not at the risk of that man’s life. Think you can handle it without”—she lifted our joined hands to make freakin’ air quotes—“throwing down.”
“Are you poking fun at me?”
“Never!” She laughed, and damn, nothing else could have made me feel better than that sound.
“Fine, I’ll control myself. But if you need me to...”
“Hola, hermosa,” the shop owner, an older Mexican man with deep wrinkles and a wide smile, said as we approached.Hello beautiful.
“Hola. Estas son bonitas.” She praised his goods with a warm smile, and she didn’t look scared. I squeezed her hand, and she squeezed mine back. “Wait! That wasn’t a kick-his-ass-for-me squeeze.”
I laughed, loudly. I didn’t think there was any way I’d ever laugh about her situation, but her happiness was infectious.