He moaned, his eyes fluttering open.
“Hey, there.” She brushed a lock of hair off his forehead. “How do you feel?”
His lips curved in a drugged, sleepy smile. “Happy to see you.”
“I’m not going anywhere.” She picked up his water pitcher, guiding the plastic straw so it wouldn’t jab him where his lip had split. “Drink.”
He raised his head, did as she’d asked, then reached for her hand with his right hand, his fingers threading with hers. “How are the others?”
“I’ve been to see them all.” She wouldn’t go into detail. He didn’t need to know that Cruz had almost bled out and had lost part of his colon, or that O’Neal would have to have his knee replaced and had come close to losing his leg. “They’re all going to recover. They’re moving Malik out of ICU tomorrow.”
Derek squeezed her fingers. “How are you doing—and don’t tell me you’re fine. No one who has been through what you went through today is fine.”
Jenna started to say that she was coping, but her throat went tight, tears filling her eyes. She wiped them away. “I’ll be okay. I just need some time. I’ve never seen anything like…”
“I’m sorry, Jenna. I was supposed to keep you safe. I failed you.”
“Don’t say that! You did everything you could. You almost died. If Cobra hadn’t gotten there when they did, Qassim would have…”
In her mind, she saw Qassim raise his rifle, point it at Derek.
“You risked your life for mine, Jenna. You tried to reach me, to cover me with your own body. That’s not how it’s supposed to go with bodyguards.”
“I couldn’t let him kill you, Derek. I …” She stopped herself from telling him she loved him a second time.
“Do you know who I saw today?” His gaze was soft, his swollen lips curling in a slight smile. “I saw Jimmy—in you. I saw his courage in you. What you did—for me, for Jones… You’re one in a million, Jenna. Just like your brother.”
Derek’s words put a hitch in Jenna’s chest, tears spilling down her cheeks.
But at that moment, the nurse walked in.
“You’re awake!” She had a thermometer in one hand. “I’m here to check your vitals. How is your pain?”
Fighting to hold herself together, Jenna left the room on the pretext of refilling Derek’s ice pack. She passed the little Christmas tree the nurses had put up in the hallway. Today had been Black Friday. Back home, people had been shopping, while Derek and his men...
Jenna left the ice pack on the counter, hurried into the bathroom, then locked the door and let her tears come.
* * *
Three days later,Derek was discharged, his left arm in a sling, an RX for pain meds in his hand. While Corbray stayed behind to oversee repairs of their compound in Mazar-e-Sharif and to deal with Kazi, Derek flew with Jenna, Cruz, O’Neal, Ortiz, and Jones on a special medical transport from Bagram Air Base to the U.S. military hospital in Landstuhl, Germany. From there, Cruz, Jones, and O’Neal would be admitted to the hospital, while Ortiz, Derek and Jenna stayed at Cobra’s Frankfurt facility where Derek could heal up a bit before heading back to the States.
During the flight, Jenna watched over him and the others as if they were her patients, and it was clear that his men adored her. Jones told anyone who would listen how she had climbed out of an armored Land Cruiser with bullets flying to save his life.
Jenna deserved the glory.
She deserved more than that. She deserved a man who was good to her, a man who was worthy of her, a man who could give her the life she wanted—a happy home and her own babies to hold.
Derek wanted to be that man, but he didn’t know how. He’d never been in a long-term relationship. Though he’d like to blame that on his job, the truth was more pathetic.
He’d never had a family. He’d never known that kind of life. Until he’d met Jimmy, he’d never even had a close friend. How could he give a classy, smart woman like Jenna the life she deserved when he didn’t know what a normal life looked like?
Figure it out, or let her go.
It was that simple.
It wasn’t simple at all.
She’d told him she loved him. The truth was that he loved her, too. He loved her down to his blood and bones. He hadn’t said a damned thing about it since, afraid to set something in motion that she would come to regret. They hadn’t spoken about the future at all—where she would go, what she would do, whether they would see each other once they got back to the U.S.