Her soft chuckle fans against my cheek.
“The feeling is mutual,” the guard mutters.
As much as I’d like to protest, the clock is ticking, and I don’t want to waste any more time. Not tonight.
We fall back in line behind the guard and Allette’s friend. My hand begins to tingle, yearning for her delicate embrace. Instead, I must settle for the occasional graze.
After what feels like forever, we reach a paved road that leads to a quaint village of squatty, white-washed buildings with straw-like roofs. Men and women in masks spill out of a pub, flagons in hand, laughing and singing a bawdy tune.
Heads turn as we pass, all the men making eyes at my pretty peacock. I step a bit closer, until her skirts brush my ankles. “So, these suitors of yours. Should I be worried about them?”
Allette’s smile vanishes. “Don’t start.”
“Why not? I’m allowed to be curious.”
“No, you’re not.”
The narrow street widens into a crowded square lined with colorful buildings. A man dressed as a white rabbit saws on an old fiddle next to a mammoth bonfire licking at the night sky.Bathed in the flickering glow, the people become silhouettes, weaving and swaying to the lively tune.
“I can’t help it,” I confess. Allette has men calling over hoping to win her affections, while I can’t even hold her hand while strolling through the market.
Sighing, she props her hands on her hips, looking up at me with an unreadable expression in her eyes. “I must marry someone,Simon.”
Bloody Simon. She can’t even call me by my given name in case someone overhears. The thought of my girl marrying another man is like a poisoned dagger to the fucking heart. “Are you interested in any of them?”
“I am only interested in you.”
“Were you interested, though? Before we met, I mean.” I don’t know why I’m pushing the issue, but for some reason, I need to know.
Her eyes lift to the heavens, and she breathes an exasperated huff. “Yes. Are you happy now?”
How can I be happy when it feels as if I’m on the verge of losing the most precious thing in my life? “What is his name?” Do I know him? Has he been at court? Will she go back to him while I’m in Nimbiss? Gods, the thought of returning to Kumulus and not having her waiting for me leaves me short of breath. This can’t be our last night together. It can’t.
She pats my heart as if she can hear it breaking. “His name doesn’t matter. I love you and only you.”
I love her as well, but that isn’t going to save me from marrying someone else. This woman is the one the stars have chosen for me—that I have chosen for myself—and yet, none of that matters.
“Can we please drop this and have some fun? We don’t have all night.” Although she smiles up at me, her mouth remains strained.
We don’t have all night.
That sounds so ominous, but what more can I do other than fix a false smile on my face to hide the fact that I’m dying inside. “Of course. Do you want a drink?”
“That would be lovely. Thank you.” Allette turns to her friend, who has been watching the unsuspecting masked humans mix with masked fae. “Would you like a drink, Wynn?”
The small woman smiles, shaking her head. “I can get my own.”
As if I’d let that happen. “Nonsense. It would be my honor to treat you both. Do you want one as well?” I reluctantly ask the guard. Maybe he’ll be a bit more bearable with some drink on board.
You’d swear from the horrified look in his eyes that I suggested he strip naked and leap over the bonfire.
“I’m on duty,” he clips.
Plenty of guards drink while they’re on duty. I should know because I’m usually the one buying the rounds. Makes it easier to lose them that way.
“Suit yourself.” I wave to a stooped woman in a green goblin mask holding a tray laden with steaming glasses of mulled wine. When she sees me, I order three glasses and hand over the human coins Aeron gave me. We raise our drinks for a toast, my eyes colliding with Allette’s. “To love. May we be lucky enough to find it and strong enough to hold onto it.”
Her eyes glisten with unshed tears when she taps her glass against mine and whispers, “To love.”