Had she been kissing him this entire time?Oh god. Had they been sharing the same bed? How far had he let this lie go?
My tears returned with a vengeance, and this time, there was no hope of stopping them.
I balled up my serviette and threw it on the table beside my untouched goblet of wine. I needed to get out of here before he saw me break. I clambered to my feet, hurrying toward the door and straight for the courtyard. Not even the sun’s rays beating down on my brow could thaw the frost overtaking my heart.
“Where are you going?” Keelynn called from the castle steps, her serviette clutched in her pale hands.
I stopped and turned, hating myself for doing this to my sister. “I can’t be here anymore,” I choked, gasping for breath as I scrubbed at the tears painting my cheeks. “I’m so sorry. I feel as if I am abandoning you in your time of need.”
She waved me off with her serviette. “Don’t worry about me. I will be fine.”
Her lie didn’t sound very convincing. Yet I didn’t have it in me to stay.
The only way to escape was the way I’d come in. I called magic to my palm, shifting one of the daggers from my cottage back in Hollowshade.
“What do ye need?” Ruairi called, jogging toward me. When he saw the blade in my hand, he froze.
I needed Rían to hold me close. To let me go. To dosomethingbesides asking me to stand by and do nothing.
Damn stubborn tears. I swiped my hands over my damp cheeks once more. “I need you to bring my body back to the cottage.” The tip of the blade scraped below my sternum. I inhaled a deep breath and—
Rían appeared right in front of me, his shuttered eyes swirling with black. The dagger vanished right out of my hand.
“Give it back,” I cried, hating that I sounded like a petulant child.
He shook his head, his voice catching. “You can’t go.”
Ruairi took my hand, drawing me back a step so he could wedge himself between Rían and me. Rían glowered at our connection. When he spoke, his words shook with rage. “Leave us, dog, or I will make you.”
Ruairi didn’t budge.
As much as I appreciated his willingness to put himself in danger on my behalf, I could fight my own battles. I pressed a hand to the pooka’s back. When Ruairi glanced over his shoulder, I nodded. Only then did he move aside.
Rían reached for me, but I stumbled back. My heart broke a little more when he began to plead. “Please don’t do this. Please don’t leave me.”
Was he serious right now? Don’t leavehim? After he’d left me to fend for myself while he swanned around with another bloody woman? “You left me first.”
“I didn’t go anywhere.” He dragged on the front of his shirt, twisting the fabric in his white-knuckled grip. “I’m right feckin’ here!”
If only that were true. He may have been within arm’s reach, but he was farther away than he’d ever been. “Take my hand and bring me back to my cottage.” At least then I could leave without having to die.
His expression hardened. “No.”
“Why not? It’s what you wanted, isn’t it? For me to leave and never return.” Stubborn bloody fae prince. Couldn’t he see what he was doing to me? Didn’t he care at all that I was becoming a shell of a person? Surely he, of all people, would understand wanting to be free of such torment. “I cannot be here with you. It’s killing me.”
Cursing, he raked a trembling hand through his mahogany hair. “I know. I know it is. And I’m sorry.” His hands fell to his sides. “I’m just trying to figure all of this out. It’s my fault she died. All of this is my fault.”
It wasn’t his fault. It was the Queen’s.
And we were left drowning in the consequences.
“Do you still love her?” If he could say here and now that he no longer cared for Leesha, that all of this was purely out of obligation, then perhaps I could find the strength to stay.
Rían’s face crumpled, but he said not a word.
His silence was all the confirmation I needed that the Queen had finally won.
Somehow, I managed to swallow past the lump in my throat. “Ruairi?” The pooka stepped away from the wall where he’d been leaning. “Bring me to Hollowshade.”