I wasn’t sure I had it in me.
“I’m sorry that I—”
“Stop apologizing for something that is not your fault.”
“I should’ve known better,” she whispered.
“No,Ishould’ve known better. This is my world, not yours. I never should’ve lifted those feckin’ wards.”
“Where was Ruairi?” Her voice broke on his name.
“He said you left him a note to meet him in the kitchens.”
Aveen washed herself as if she could scrub away the memories of what could’ve happened to her. I wrapped a soft linen towel around her shivering shoulders and shifted her something comfortable to sleep in. She ignored the white cotton shift, slipping beneath my covers and curling onto her side.
I removed my boots and joined her in the bed, needing to hold her, to remind myself that she had survived this. That fate had given me more time with her. I’d hoard these moments, hoardheruntil she was ripped from my grasp.
I slipped an arm around her and buried my nose against her damp hair, breathing her in. “I got a cat for my fifth birthday,” I said, desperate to take our minds off the day. “I named him Sir Fluffy Paws.”
“That’s a good name,” she whispered, her tone devoid of emotion.
“It’s a feckin’ brilliant name. Think of the fluffiest thing you’ve ever seen, then multiply it by ten. That’s how fluffy his paws were.”
Dampness seeped into my shirt, her soft tears watering my soul.
“One time, I glamoured myself to look like my father. Nearly got me into a very awkward situation with Tadhg’s mam.”
“Tadhg’s mother?”
“He’s only my half-brother. Same philandering father. Different mothers.”
After a beat, she asked if I could make myself look like her.
“If I did that, I’d want to touch myself all the time. I’d never get anything done.”
I felt her smile against my chest. “You are ridiculous.”
“Only for you.”
For her, I’d be whatever she wanted. Whatever she needed. All she had to do was say the word.
Her heavy sigh tickled my throat. “Rían? I want a—”
Someone knocked on my door. Reluctantly, I let her go, sliding off the mattress and crossing to the doorway. Tadhg waited on the other side, his eyes swirling with black. “We found them,” he said. “They’re waiting downstairs.”
* * *
Aveen and I waited in the study. I needed a moment to compose myself. To make sure I didn’t burst through the door and murder everyone. This was a trial only. The executions would come later.
“It’ll be all right,” I said for what felt like the hundredth time, not sure which one of us I was trying to convince. I needed to get Aveen out of Tearmann, that much was clear. But how?
From the hall, I heard Muireann’s voice. Aveen’s shoulders stiffened, her wide, panicked eyes swinging toward me.
“You know who she is,” I said, although her ghostly pale face was all the confirmation I needed. I should’ve boiled the feckin’ fish when I’d had the chance.
“I need you to come with me.” We needed undeniable proof that Muireann was responsible. Once we had it, I’d handle the rest.
“I can’t.”