Victor considered that response. For a young girl who’d spent the majority of her childhood being “overlooked,” he imagined ithadfelt good to be needed. More than that, though, Belle had taken that responsibility very seriously. His respect for her rose. “You could have gone on dates, Belle. Vivian never expected you to put your entire life on hold.”
“I overheard what you said to Viv the day she left,” Belle added.
Victor frowned, confused. “What I said?”
She didn’t answer right away. Instead, she looked out into the yard, her expression thoughtful in a way he didn’t see very often. “You told her she deserved to do something for herself…and I started thinking the same thing could apply to me.”
Victor nodded, aware those words did work for Belle as well. She’d put her life on hold, dedicating herself to his sister and niece, stepping in to help fill the enormous void left when Phil died.
“It does apply. Youdodeserve that.”
“So, since I’m about to come into some time, I’ve decided to start putting a little energy into my own future. Because if these past five years have taught me anything, it’s that I want to be a mother.”
Victor leaned back in his chair, trying to ignore how much he liked the image of a very pregnant Belle waddling around, rubbing her stomach.
Kids weren’t part of Victor’s plan for the future. Sure, he’d considered it when he was in his twenties, but as more time passed, he’d gotten too comfortable, too content in his peaceful,unencumbered life. This past season, he’d watched four of his teammates succumb to Cupid’s arrows, falling head over heels in love. Hell, Preston didn’t just find the woman of his dreams, he also discovered he was a father, following a one-night stand over a year ago. Talk about instant family.
“You’d be a great mother,” he said, aware that he’d let the silence drift a little too long. Something sharp lodged in his chest. Not pain, exactly, but close enough to recognize.
“Thanks. Unfortunately, I’ve lost contact with a lot of my friends from school and my old jobs, and my social life is currently nonexistent, so I’ve subjected myself to…” She sighed heavily. “Online dating.”
He shook his head, hating that idea more than he should. “That’s a shitty way to meet people. Most of the guys on those sites are just looking to get laid.”
Belle didn’t seem to agree. “Maybe some, but I’m sure there are just as many guys who are in the same boat as me. Looking for someone to date, to spend time with.”
“It’s not safe,” he barked, when it seemed clear she was going to be hard to dissuade.
“Of course, it is. It’s not like I’m going to meet the guys for the first time in some seedy motel. I’m just going to set up coffee dates—in my old coffee shop. That’s plenty public enough, plus my boss is a great guy, and I know he’ll keep an eye on me.”
Victor wasn’t surprised that Belle’s former employers thought as highly of her as Vivian. But even knowing she’d be safe during her dates didn’t set his mind at ease.
Because he didn’t like the idea of someone else getting to see those dimples or hear that tinkling laugh or touch her.
That thought came too fast, uninvited and unwelcome.
It was also completely honest.
Fuck.
The idea of someone looking at her—reallylooking at her—made his chest go tight and hot all at once. He didn’t have a right to that reaction, because he wasn’t about to stake his own claim.
She was Pip’s nanny. Part of the family. He knew that. Logically and completely.
It didn’t help.
Victor’s jaw tightened. “Sounds like you’ve already signed up for it.”
Belle blushed. “A couple months ago. Though I haven’t had time to do more than message with guys. Vivian and I were busy getting ready for her trip. It’s just…I haven’t been able to stop thinking about what you said to Viv. I think I deserve to do something for myself too.”
“How’s it going?” he forced himself to ask.
“Mostly awkward,” she admitted with a laugh. “I’ve endured a few strange conversations.”
He didn’t like that.
“But I’ve also started talking to a couple of guys who seem nice.”
“That’s good,” he said, the words tasting like shit.