I shift in my seat, trying to process the information.
Six months. Six months of men following me, learning my routines, my habits. Mylife.
But he’s not done.
“That was for routine monitoring. Before that, I had men checking in on you, reporting back to me about how you were doing. Sometimes, I did it myself.”
He’d told me this before, but only now is the reality of it hitting me, that my life has never been my own. I’d been passed around, watched and surveilled, never once making decisions for myself. And now I’m here in this mansion, trapped and controlled yet again.
“What happened before then? At the beginning of those six months?”
“That’s when I received word that Kolya and his crew had tracked you down and knew where you lived and where you worked. I had to know if you were in immediate danger.”
“So you had me followed. Stalked me.”
“I had youprotected. It was for your own go?—”
“My own good. Yeah, I’ve heard it all before. And that means you not only knew about the auction, but you also knew about the roofie, about what was going to happen to me that night.”
His silence is answer enough.
“You knew,” I say. “And you let it happen. You knew the fate of the women at those auctions. You knew what was going to happen to me, to Sylvie.”
“Thea—”
“You let them drug me and drag me onto that stage. You let me think I was going to—” God, I can’t even say it. “You let it happen.”
“I had to. I couldn’t intervene without exposing my hand. If I had simply taken you, Kolya would’ve made a move out of a sense of panic. He would’ve known that I was looking after you, he would’ve found out that Liza and Sissy had been looking after you. I needed to let the auction happen so I could have plausible deniability.”
“So you used me as bait.”
“I used the situation?—”
“You usedme. Was any of this real? Or was I just another piece on your chessboard?”
“Everything that’s happened between us is real. Everything I feel for you?—”
“I don’t know what you feel! I don’t know what’s real and what’s strategy. For all I know, everything you’ve done since day one has been to take out Kolya, to use me as a way to resurrect what my family was, so you can bring it all under your control. You’ve lied to me so many times before. How am I supposed to know when the truth starts?”
I can’t breathe suddenly. I need space.
“Thea—”
But I’m already moving. I rush out of the living room and up the stairs to my room. I close the door and lock it.
I sink to the floor and let myself fall apart, let the tears flow.
And as I sit there, sobbing, a horrible thought occurs to me. He’s right. If he’d approached me six months ago, there’s no way I would’ve believed him. I would’ve told him to screw off and put myself right in the open, where Kolya could’ve gotten to me.
If he’s telling the truth, then the auction was the only way he could control what I did and the only way he could bring me to the mansion, where I’d be safe.
He saved my life.
But he also manipulated me every damn step of the way. If he’s telling the truth, then everything he did was truly for my own good.And I have no idea how to reconcile it all.
There’s a knock at the door. I know it’s him before he says a word.
“Thea. Please let me in.”