Chapter Twenty
Two months changed everything and absolutely nothing.
Lucy threw herself into the social whirl and Grace’s wedding preparations. She learned with her sister how to hire servants and manage a staff. Lucy would only manage her father’s small household, but her sister was to be a duchess. Together they undertook a lady’s education in a very short amount of time. And Lucy shuddered to think of how Cedric’s sisters managed such a thing on a very tight budget.
And she let herself enjoy the men who courted her.
Except none of them stirred her the way Cedric once had. It was damned depressing. Especially since she saw him at her sister’s wedding. He was so handsome in his English finery that he took her breath away. And when he looked at her, she wanted to leap across the room, straight into his arms.
She couldn’t. She didn’t feel that way about him anymore. And yet, when he at last came to greet her, she nearly melted when he complimented her dress. It was a form statement, said by nearly everyone here. But he held her hand longer than anyone else did, and he looked in her eyes when he said she was beautiful. Then he added one more phrase.
‘I’m awed by you.’
There was such feeling in the statement, such intensity when he said it, that her emotions nearly swallowed her whole. She tried to respond, but had no words. And then the moment was lost. His attention was caught by someone else. He turned away from her, and she was left wondering if she was reading too much into his words. If she was hearing what she wanted to hear or if there was something between them still.
Did she want that? Did she want him?
Yes, a thousand times yes. And also no.
And so she turned her attention to the next guest and kept her mind and heart strictly under control.
He left immediately after the bridal breakfast and she saw him no more that day. Or the next. Or for the next month.
At least the wedding was beautiful, and her sister seemed ecstatic. Husband and wife disappeared soon afterwards on a honeymoon trip while Lucy settled into management of her father’s tiny home. The first thing she did was dismiss her annoying chaperone. The next thing was to find a doctor for her father.
He was ailing, his cough continuing, and she very much feared for his life. He, on the other hand, made plans to visit his parents’ graves on a family estate owned by his older brother. And he did not want her to join him.
‘Not this time, my dear,’ her father said. ‘I need to have words with my brother, and those had best be done in private.’
‘He will not approve of me,’ she said quietly.
Her father shrugged. ‘He doesn’t matter. I do.’ He took her hands and pressed kisses into them. ‘It is sooner than I wanted, but you are out now. Next Season you will have the gentlemen clamoring for your hand.’
It hadn’t waited for the next Season. ‘I am well content.’
‘I’m glad. But know that I plan to put a substantial amount into your dowry.’
‘Father—’
‘We have to wait until the next ship returns to figure out exactly how much.’ Then he grinned. ‘Or perhaps I should say you will decide. I am very pleased with how you managed the accounts forThe Integrity.’
‘Thank you, but—’
‘No, no. Leave a man to dote on his only remaining daughter.’ Then he sighed. ‘If I could, I would go back there and bring out a dozen more of your kin.’
By kin, he meant all the other half-white Chinese orphans raised at the temple. ‘You are too kind.’ She meant it. All that travel would kill him. And yet, she couldn’t love him more for the good heart he had.
So she closed up their small London place and went to stay with the honeymooning couple. She saw the love between the two of them and her heart ached. And every time she saw their tender looks, she thought about Cedric. And she wondered when her heart would begin to heal.
What a change two months had wrought. Her sister was a duchess and blissfully happy. And how everything ended up the same. Lucy was yet again hanging on, an extra piece of baggage intruding on her sister’s life.
What was she going to do with the rest of her life?
Then came the morning that she and her sister were drinking tea in the parlor and the Duke sauntered in with a big grin on his face.
‘What has you so happy?’ Grace asked as she extended her cheek for a kiss.
‘I have finished with my solicitor, my banker and my steward, not to mention my valet and your maid.’