He shook his head, feeling the pound of a headache beginning.
“What is it now?” Eleanor said with an annoyed clip to her words. “This is exactly what you wanted. You told me so at the beginning.”
Had he? Perhaps. Well, yes. And yet, now that he was here, everything felt so very wrong. “I told my grandfather I would not give her up.”
“Well, of course yousaidthat—”
“I meant it.” He looked directly at Mellie. “I will not give you up.”
Mellie looked at him, her gaze steady, her body composed. Then she asked her question. “Why?”
Why? Damnation, he wasn’t exactly sure why he was so determined. His thoughts were so muddled. So he said the easiest words to leap to his lips. “It’s what I told my grandfather. A gentleman doesn’t go back on his word.”
“I know,” she said, and he thought for a moment that she understood. If she would just give him some time, he was sure they could work things out with clarity. He just needed to think things through, preferably with her. But she simply lifted her chin and spoke. “That is exactly why I will cry off.”
“No!”
“Yes. That was the plan, after all. Eleanor, how do I do this?”
Eleanor clapped her hands together, her expression both happy and relieved. “Well, as to that, there are a number of options. But we needn’t have him here to discuss them. Good night, Trevor. Do understand that when I give you the cut direct tomorrow I shall eventually forgive you.”
“What?” He reached for Mellie, but she had already moved toward the stairs, and he found he’d grabbed Eleanor’s elbow instead. “This is not what I want.”
“Yes,” Eleanor said firmly, “it is.” And then she handed him his hat, the damned cloak, and shoved him toward the door. Yes, she actually shoved him out, and he was too much of a gentleman to fight her. Especially as Mellie started climbing the stairs offering him a halfhearted wave as she turned her back.
“Good-bye, Trevor. Thank you for everything.”
He waited a moment, blocking the open door as he tried to think. But damn it, she just kept walking away. And Eleanor repeated the one thing he’d been thinking this whole time.
“This was the plan, Trevor. This is what you both want.”
Well, given Mellie’s last words, she was half right. It was clearly exactly what Mellie wanted. So he had to agree. He had to put his hat onto his head and step out into the darkness. It was what she wanted. And he had abused her too much to take that away.
Nineteen
Rakes expect grand emotional displays. Ruin him with regal disdain.
Mellie heard the front door close as if it had shut something away inside her. The numbness didn’t creep in as usual. It simply consumed her. One moment he was here, and she was alive. The next, everything in her was frozen, and he was gone.
She knew things were happening around her. Eleanor kept talking for one. Her feet were moving for another, and eventually, she found herself at her bedroom door. But nothing truly registered.
“Go to sleep, Melinda. Everything will feel better in the morning.”
Would it? She nodded because Eleanor seemed to expect her to respond. Then her sleepy maid joined them, helping her to strip out of her gown. Eleanor shut the door and sought her own bed, leaving Mellie to random stray thoughts.
She’d lost all the feathers on her gown.
Trevor.
Her cricket ring felt heavy, but when she took it off, she felt its absence.
Her hair was knotted.
Trevor.
There was a spot of dirt on the wall by her dressing table.
Trevor.