“Take a slow breath in through your nose, hold for a count of two, then let it out through your mouth.”
I inhale, immediately aware of Talon beside me. His scent, the warmth of him. We’re not touching, but his presence feels… solid.
And somehow quiet at the same time.
Like he could disappear if you blinked.
“Inhale again… feel your chest rise… exhale, let your shoulders soften…”
I follow along. Some of the tension in my body eases—tension I didn’t even realize I was holding.
Usually, I keep busy so I don’t have to think.
Now there’s nothing else to do.
“Don’t worry if thoughts come up. Just notice them, let them pass, and return to your breath.”
He’s good. It’s like he’s reading my mind. I try to follow, and for a moment, I actually relax.
“Let your breath return to its natural rhythm. Don’t control it. Just notice it—the cool air in, the warm air out.”
I glance across the room and see Bertha, sitting completely still—too still. Like she’s slipped into something deeper than the rest of us.
A flicker of unease tightens in my chest.
Is this real… or am I just seeing what I expect to see?
The room smells faintly of eucalyptus, mixed with soap and fresh wood from Talon. Clean. Grounding.
The longer I sit like this, the more I feel… surrounded.
Part of something larger.
For a second, I want to reach out. Take Talon’s hand. Or Reid’s.
The eucalyptus makes me think of him—how he smells now. Herbal, calming, but underneath it, leather and something darker.
It’s a scent I know too well.
I remember it from earlier. From his body over mine. The way we fit—like nothing had changed.
Like we still worked, even when everything else didn’t.
“If your mind wanders,” the instructor continues, “just notice it and bring it back. No judgment.”
Easier said than done.
When I push thoughts of Bertha and of Reid away, they shift to Luke instead—his easy smile, the scars on his arms.
What happened?
I’ve been wondering for days, and I can’t let it go. Some cuts are deep, some shallow. None are fresh.
But still—why?
“Let your awareness expand to your body,” the instructor says. “Notice the weight of it. If there’s tension, breathe into it. Let it soften.”
I breathe, letting the tension ease. Maybe I should just ask Luke and get it over with.